Written by Jaggedone
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Wednesday, 6 February 2013

image for Gazza goes to rehab on a pint!
It aint easy taking penalties for England especially against Germany!

Gazza, better known as Paul Gascoigne, super-footballer, super drinker and ex-England hero has sadly hit rock-bottom because of his alcohol problems

The soccer world has not forgetten how great this man was for England and are supporting him in his final chance of living a reasonably normal life. Robin Williams will also be there to meet him and give a few tips and belly-laughs!

Before he entered Rehab Gazza was caught downing a pint or two at the airport and he told the scavenging paparazzi why and here is the reason:

"Guys, this final pint is like the English taking penalties against the Germans: Walking to the penalty spot is lifting your arm: Get the colly-wobbles, start shaking, kick the f'ng ball over the crossbar is the moment before you swallow and realise; I'm a fucking loser. Walk back to the middle with a teardrop in your eye, realise you failed, down the pint and thank the Lord that he invented booze to ease the agony!"

Now we all know why Gazza has so many problems and we hope he recovers because he was bloody good and not only at boozing!

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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