Written by David Grant
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Saturday, 24 November 2012

image for Hamilton Driving on Wrong Team - Braun Happy
Lewis in Practice

Formula One driver Lewis Hamilton has been caught in a mix-up that means his dream of driving for Mercedes has been dashed to pieces.

In a million to one chance, he has mistakenly signed a contract that means he will be delivering Braun shavers in a truck all of next year. The venue for his Mercedes contract signing was right next door to the Braun Shaver Open House Employment Day.

"I must have gone in through the wrong door," he said regretfully, "I heard the words Brawn and driving and signed whatever was put in front of me."

The contract is apparently extremely rigid, and impossible for him to annul. The unexpected consequence of this is that Louis Hambleton, the prospective driver for Braun shavers, is signed up for a year at Mercedes.

Braun is quite happy about the enhanced profile it has meant for the company. "His first delivery will be on Monday at 5 a.m. from Leeds to London. We are expecting a quick time, and we have a pit crew that will change his tyres at Tamworth Services," said a spokesperson.

Mercedes are pleasantly surprised at the times being produced by their new driver. One Mercedes mechanic said, "He has already shaved two seconds off Hamilton's best lap time."

When I said to the mechanic that it was no problem and that after a year they will be able to get Lewis back, he replied, "Uh, yeah."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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