Football Association officials were keeping positive today when they announced that Swedish flavour of the month Zlatan Ibrahimovitch could still qualify to play for England, despite scoring four times against the Three Lions in an international friendly.
An FA insider told us in confidence "We've given up on Wilfred Zaha. He looked ok when he came on as sub, but with Ivory Coast - where his parents were born - offering him more chances of actually winning something at international level, it looks likely he will choose the elephants (nickname)"
The official revealed the Association had turned their focus to the Swedish hotshot. "We're now focusing on convincing Zlatan that he has a bit of Anglo-Saxon background in his family tree. Ibrahimovtich is a very English name - we've checked the social security register in parts of East London. We don't think he's really Swedish - he doesn't have blonde hair and has never slept with Ulrika. We've decided to take a leaf out of the Republic of Ireland recruitment policy - if he's drunk a pint of Guinness - in our case London Pride - he's one of us"