Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Wednesday, 10 October 2012

image for Terrell Owens Wants To Be A New York Jet
Terrell Owens wants to be a New York Jets so bad he is even willing to drive the team bus. (Photo courtesy of Tim Tebow).

NEW YORK CITY - The habitual troublemaker and pathological whiner known as "T.O" (Terrell Owens) says that he wants to be given a third or fourth chance to show that he can still play and compete in the NFL.

Owens, who made over $66 million during his NFL career says that now he only has about $712.91 in his checking account.

He called up Jets coach Rex Ryan, after the Jets lost to the best team in the NFL the Houston Texans 23-17. The Texans are the only undefeated team in football with a 5-0 record.

The 39-year-old Owens, who was cut by the Seattle Seahawks in the summer due to running his mouth, intimately flirting with a cheerleader, and making fun of a hot dog vendor, says that he can still outrun all defensive ends and cornerbacks.

According to Sports Balls Illustrated Daily, Owens said that he would be willing to sign a four game trial basis at the unheard of salary of $1,000 per game.

The average wide receiver in the NFL makes a little over one million dollars a year, which averages out to $66,000 per game.

Owens is so desperate to play for the Jets that he has told Coach Ryan that he will even pay for his own uniform and helmet, his own cleats, and even for his own Gatorade.

SIDENOTE: Coach Ryan has reportedly informed Mr. Owens that he will talk it over with the Jets team therapist and Jets owner Woody Johnson and he will try to get back to him before their game with the Indianapolis Colts on Sunday, October 14.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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