Written by Talking Tic-Tacs

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Saturday, 6 October 2012

image for Hodgson to Announce 25-man England Squad, to some bloke on Train
Simply look into Roy Hodgson's eyes and ask. And he will tell you.

After divulging Rio Ferdinand's omission from the England squad to a passenger on the tube, Roy Hodgson is expected to name his full 25 man squad on the 19:15 Portsmouth to London, when asked by some guy.

It is thought he may announce the squad before then however. If anyone, anywhere asks him before then.

Since telling a fan the information on Wednesday night, Hodgson has also revealed to random members of the public his favourite sexual position (any), his 'dream girl' (Bett Lynch), why it didn't work out at Liverpool (Scousers hated him) and, in an emotional conversation with a woman in the fruit aisle at Tesco, how he and FA chief David Bernstein share a bond through their mutual speech impediments.

The latter is expected to ignite controversy over alleged favouritism shown towards Hodgson when Bernstein was involved in appointing the England manager. A sort of impaired-talking nepotism, if you will.

Hodgson is said to be "vewy vewy shocked" at the allegations. He is believed to be currently smarting in a luxury retreat with soul mate Bernstein. And Jonathan Ross.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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