Written by Ossurworld
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Topics: Red Sox Nation

Saturday, 29 September 2012

What a season for the Red Sox. The manager in his final series of the season posted a lineup in which spelling mistakes of his starters proved how the team has gone in the direction of apathetic nobodies.

We spent a hard year learning to spell some difficult names, not to mention learning how to pronounce them too.

It may be all for naught-again.

Many of these names shall be gone in a week or two-disappearing from Red Sox lexicon unless a debate rages over the worst team in fifty years.

We wonder if Podsednik will return. Even now we look at the spelling and think, Nenad Krstic was easier to spell.

Ciriaco is a typo waiting to happen. We have made ourselves proud at how many times we seem to have Saltalamacchia tripping off our tongue and keyboard this year. It fills up nearly a line of copy and tests our denture glue.

Iglesias is a name we still pause to repeat. We still are unsure whether it is Inglesias. Oh, well, a rose by any other name.

We have had first baseman-itis. Often we say and spell Gomez, as in Addams, for Gomes. And we have more than once spelled Looney for Loney. Lavarnaway went thataway as well.

Ross and Nava were easy as pie, but whether those tasty cakes go elsewhere in off-season we cannot say.

We haven't even touched the pitching staff where Cook, Morals, Doobrond, Bucchholtz, and Alceves make us cry.

Wait till next year.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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