Written by Ossurworld
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Thursday, 13 September 2012

Bobby Valentine has set a new record for ejections from a regular season game in Boston Red Sox history. We doubt he will set the mark in post-season games.

Six is now the new high-water mark for a Red Sox manager.

That seems a little low-especially for a man(ager) that Boston media have accused of "checking out." Once again the check has bounced.

Bobby himself has told interviewers and questioners at one of his always-lively press conferences that such questions strain the credulity of a man in his position.

The quality of mercy is not strained, but droppeth like the gentle rain from heaven. Alas, Bobby is showing no mercy in his approach to the game. When it rains, it pours.

The almighty umpires are not to be challenged on mundane matters of balls and strikes. So, when Cody Ross took umbrage with a call in the eighth inning with the game on the line, Bobby came to his defense.

Unlike Bobby, Cody has only been tossed out twice in his lifetime.

Volatile Valentine had unwittingly set his own fate when he took to the field. When he found out he was officially out, he decided not to go gently into that good night with the Yankees.And, he did not even threaten to punch the ump in the mouth.

More cynical fans than we will accuse Valentine of over-reacting and playing to the crowd. September against the Yankees with the season down the chute may be a good time to have a great time blowing a gasket.

There is a decided connection with how out of the running a manager's team is to his frequency to be run out of a game.

For the cellar-dwelling Red Sox the glory days are now eclipsed by the sump pump days.

If Bobby forces the umps the give the old double pump, it shows that the manager is no golden ager-but is a viable member of the Walking Dead.

There is more gravy train than grave in Valentine.

There are as many bullet holes in Bobby's carcass as Marlon Brando suffered in The Godfather.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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