Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Saturday, 11 August 2012

image for Dwight Howard Leaves MagicLand For LaLaLand
Dwight says that he and Bryant and Nash will bring the NBA title back to L.A. (Photo courtesy of Jack Nicholson).

LOS ANGELES - The general manager of the Los Angeles Lakers Mitch Kupchak has just announced to the sports media that he is as happy as a termite on a viking ship.

Kupchak spoke personally with Rufus Reno of Sports Balls Illustrated Daily and said that he still cannot believe that they have actually acquired the great all-star center Dwight Howard from the Orlando Magic.

He noted that it may sound silly but he can actually smell the Western Conference Championship as well as the NBA Finals Championship.

Getting Howard was no easy task as the wheeling and dealing involved 4 NBA teams, 12 players, 5 future draft picks, 3 cheerleaders, and 2 hot dog vendors.

"Cupcake" Kuchak said that when he called up Kobe Bryant in London and told him the news the long time Laker dropped the phone. Luckily it landed on his lady friend's belly and the phone was not damaged.

Bryant was literally speechless and Kupchak said that all Kobe could manage to say was "Rrrrrrrriiiiiiing."

Newly acquired Laker Steve Nash was up in Canada hunting caribou with a slingshot when he was told of the Dwight Howard acquisition.

Nash replied, "Well it does appear that our flamboyant team is getting better and better and we will most certainly be doing a whole bunch of butt kicking once the season starts."

SIDENOTE: Andrew Bynum was sent by the Lakers to the Philadelphia 76ers and he reportedly remarked that he was glad to leave El Lay (L.A.) and get away from the smog, the earthquakes, the Santa Ana winds, the mudslides, the high cost of living, the wildfires, and most of all those irritating Kardashians.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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