Written by Jaggedone
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this

Friday, 27 July 2012

image for Cockneys boycott Olympic Games!
Cockneys boycott games and desecrate guide books in their own language!

True Cockneys are boycotting the Olympic Games which are being held in their backyard because the signposts have not been printed in the local language!

The signs have been written in English, French, German, Spanish, etc, but the Olympic organisors, posh arseholes like Seb Coe, ex Cockney and traitor, Dame Kelly Holmes, refused to accept the indigenous language of the locals as "proper lingo, mate!"

Real Cockneys dressed up in their favourite "clobber", buttoned, sequin suits, were seen protesting alongside David Beckham, who used to be a Cockney, but now he's a "posh nob Dandy", but still loves a bit of pie and mash down at Leytonstone mate and still speaks his native language when the cameras are not turned on.

Main Olympic sponsors, Coca Cola and McDonalds, don't give a crap about the native's boycott because all they're interested in is making mega-bucks! A Coca Cola rep gave his opinion about the Cockney boycott and here it is: "They can shove it up their Kyber mate!"

A Cockney boycotter then answered; "I'll punch (h)is fucking lights out mate and shove (h)is Olympics dawn is huge norf and souf, poncey pratt!"

The boycotters did manage to erect a sign in Cockney warning all visitors to mind the "apples and pears" and a group of Japanese Olympic fans were last seen asking a Cockney bobby where they were planted?

Make Jaggedone's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this


Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 4 multiplied by 1?

5 11 7 4

Go to top