Written by radiogagger
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Wednesday, 27 June 2012

image for Euro 2012: Ashley Cole and Ashley Young 'retired' from international football
From Ashley to Ashley. From Cash to Crash.

The Football Association today announced that the two penalty missers from the quarter-final defeat to Italy are both retiring from international football with immediate effect.

Ashley Cole had played 98 times for England, and only days before the match told BBC Sports Gabby Logan he would like his 100th cap in the final. Many fans thought he jinxed the result.

Ashley Young has played 25 times for England since making his debut in 2007 in a friendly against Austria. He scored 6 goals, including 3 in qualifying for Euro 2012.

The two are expected to continue playing for their club sides, Chelsea and Man United respectively. It is thought that with this unexpected 'enforced early retirement', Cole and Young could join the BBC punditry team with the two Ashley's replacing the two overpaid and overly dull Alan's - Hansen and Shearer.

The Football Association would not comment the rumour that they have instigated an across the board ban on players called Ashley.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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