Written by Jaggedone

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Monday, 25 June 2012

image for FA sue EUFA and FIFA for crimes against humanity!
They always move the goalposts when England shoot penalties; not anymore!!!

After last nights penalty shoot-out against the cool Italians, England and the FA have decided to sue both the EUFA and FIFA on the grounds of crimes against humanity, mental torture and a flagrant show of discrimination against England, English players and their WAGS.

The case is to be heard at The International court of Justice in The Hague and England feel sure they can win (Well that's at least something).

On the evidence of the terrible state of English players in last night's and past penalty shoot-outs it seems that the FA have a very good case. Ashley Young, Ashley Cole, David Beckham, Gareth Southgate and other victims actually have admitted to being put through mental and physical torture worse than water-boarding and electro-shocks (They certainly looked to be in extreme pain!).

The FA will also refuse to participate in any further penalty shoot-outs until Michel Platini comes up with a better solution. If a game ends after 90 minutes and extra-time as a draw England players will walk off of the pitch with their heads held high and offer the game to their opponents especially if they're German.

This case has shocked the football world and if England win, those running the UEFA and FIFA will be sentenced to 10 years hard-labour in Siberia and England will be re-instated as Nr 1 in the soccer world rankings because of all of the inhumane crimes committed against them.

Now that's really a "wiedergutmachen"!

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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