Written by IainB
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Saturday, 23 June 2012

image for Glasgow Rangers apply to the Welsh Premier League
We'll all change our name to Daffid if you take us!

Demoted and disgraced former Scottish Premier League winners, Glasgow Rangers, have applied to join the Welsh Premier League after being told that the only Scottish League that would accept them, was the Hebrides Third Division.

"It's no good," said Ally McMoist, "we can't be hacking all those ferry journeys. And it's not a premier division is it?"

The English Premier League had already told Rangers that they wouldn't accept them, without Rangers even asking. It would be an unusual step for a Scottish club to play in the Welsh league, but as several Welsh clubs play in the English league, and one English team played in the Scottish league, it wouldn't be unthinkable.

"Swansea play in England," said McMoist, "as do Colwyn Bay. Berwick played in Scotland for a while, too."

The Welsh FfA are considering Ranger's offer, but with a full league set up all the way down to the South Wales Under-11's Girls League, it may be that there is no room for a club, even one the size of Rangers.

"Besides," said Gareth Jones, WPL Chairperson, "Welsh clubs aren't very good, and Rangers would win easily. That's hardly fair on those clubs that have been in Wales all along. We've put the question to the chairmen of the clubs in the Welsh League."

McMoist has stated that they would change the name of the club to Glasgow Llanphilgan to fit in, but with the decision now in the hands of the Welsh League Clubs, it may be that Rangers will be unlucky.

"If the Welsh League don't take us," said McMoist, "we'll try the Irish league, although, given our Protestant background, that one might prove a step too far."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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