Written by El Presidente
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Topics: Jerry Sandusky

Saturday, 23 June 2012

Jerry Sandusky has been named as the new Head Coach for the Penn State Correctional Touch Football Team.

He will take up his position on Monday when he will meet the players and this years drafts, who should be arriving on the same bus as him later on Sunday.

The team, who last year won 7 of their Prison Championship Games, finishing 15 in the rankings, hope that with Sandusky at the top of the pile things will improve.

QB Ned "Fingers" O'Boyle, a sneak thief from Philidelphia told gathered newsmen "Jerry touches people, he knows exactly how to handle things, there will be no groping around in the dark when Jerry comes, I am sure if we mess up he will thrash us!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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