Written by Ossurworld
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Monday, 18 June 2012

When secret agent LeBron James plays Kevin Durant, there is no Thunderball. LeBron is the winner who takes all.

The NBA must guarantee that LeBron James wins a championship. Otherwise, he is an Octopussy.

The NBA has standards. When it crowns a player as a king, the entire convocation must stand in testimony lest media endorsements become diluted. Other Heat players are On His Majesty's Secret Service.

As a consequence, we can expect Thunder players to hear more whistles than are normally heard at a busy intersection during rush hour. Agent LeBron is the Man with the Golden Gun.

Kevin Durant will be called at every push or shove, and LeBron James will escape within an inch of his life with goldfingers.

The unbreakable rule is written in the Hall of Fame and Oscar movies that the star cannot commit fouls in the fourth quarter. You Only Live Twice when you go to the free throw line all the time.

LeBron can play like Tupac in Above the Rim, and he will not hear a whistle for his actions. The media knows its role, and someone is whispering into Durant's ear, "It's not your night." The Thunder are now playing in Casino Royale in Miami.

It's a line used in On The Waterfront to convey the sense of frustration an athlete feels when the loss comes from Miami with love. It's a line muttered at South Beach this week when the sirocco blows over the OKC Thunder before the storm begins.

LeBron is a Moonraker.

If naysayers may complain that the game played out as it should and the refs called what was there, the astute know they also did not call what was there. LeBron is the ultimate opponent of Dr. No.

That old dog did not bark in the night, and only those with dog's heightened senses would hear a whistle against the Heat.

Teams that win Game 3 are nearly unstoppable, and no team has won four in a row quite the way Miami shall. Diamonds are Forever when LeBron is the agent on the floor.

It's now or never time for LeBron James. And, NBA secret agents, like James LeBrond, never says never.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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