Written by Dan Cun
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Monday, 11 June 2012

image for English Hammers French
Champion!

In what many are calling an onslaught, actor Rowan Atkinson, star of Blackadder, Mr Bean and the Johnny English series of films well and truly trounced roly poly comedienne Dawn French during their annual charity game of snakes and ladders.

Atkinson who took to the field in character as Johnny English, much to the delight of the 23 strong crowd, was confident from the outset. Rolling a six and then a four he quickly traversed the board.

French, who seemed to be in some discomfort, probably due to the fact she has recently lost weight, trimming down to a relatively manageable 400 pounds for the event faltered early on, she reached the second tier of the board before throwing a two and landing on a snake.

In the end Atkinson won by a margin of 43 spaces, a new record.

"He trounced her," said one commentator. "A great victory for English but a disaster for French."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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