Written by Monkey Woods
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Topics: Tennis, French Open

Friday, 1 June 2012

image for Andy Murray/Virginia Wade Battle Rages On
Virginia Wade's back

The unsavoury war of words between the British tennis number 1 Andy Murray, and former Wimbledon champion Virginia Wade, raged on in earnest today with the gritty Scot claiming he would never again have a wank over Miss Wade.

The exchanges began after Wade called Murray a "drama queen" during his second round French Open comeback against Jarkko Nieminen.

The Briton woke up on Thursday with a back spasm that meant he could not put weight on his left leg. He was barely able to move or serve at times, and was seen by the trainer on three occasions during the match, which he eventually managed to win 1-6 6-4 6-1 6-2.

But if the back spasm was painful, 66-year-old Wade's comments were to prove excruciating for Murray, and he told a Press conference:

"She has no idea what I was going through, and maybe she should have spoken to me about it before making such hurtful comments in the media. I'll never have another wank over her as long as I live."

The last part of that quote, obviously, is not true.

Wade, who, in this picture, Virginia Wade pic, looks a little bit like an aging Gary Glitter, mocked Murray as he winced in pain every time there was a break in play, and was even heard by some TV viewers to have called the Scot "a bit of a fanny".

But the question on everyone's lips at Roland Garros this morning was:

"Is Murray just making pre-emptive excuses for his eventual knockout from the tournament?"

And the answer is "Yes, he is".

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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