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Friday, 27 April 2012

image for Orient to forfeit Hartlepool match after turning up to wrong Victoria Park?
Are We There Yet?

Leyton Orients League One survival hopes were thrown into chaos this morning when it was revealed they may have to forfeit Saturdays match v Hartlepool after the club coach driver initially took them to the wrong Victoria Park.

Instead of the Monkey hangers ground in the North-East of England, the embarrassed coach driver put North East London into his sat-nav and ended up in Victoria Park on the borders of Bethnal Green and Hackney - venue for the upcoming Radio 1 'Hackney Weekend' and annual home of the Lovebox festival started by Groove Armada in 2003.

A club insider told Gaga Sports Radio "Well it started out as a normal day, the players met at Brisbane Road and boarded the coach and started their regular game of shove ha'penny. We passed Hackney Marshes on our right and the Olympic Stadium on our left and we assumed the driver was taking the A12 to pick up the M11. But he took the slip-road instead and within minutes we were on Old Ford Road and the driver spoke over his tannoy 'approaching the ground lads'
The journey had lasted less than 15 minutes - so with any luck we can still make the correct ground before kick off at 3pm".

Hartlepool are mid-table but Leyton Orient have slumped from 12th to 19th in the table and have relied on other teams results to keep them above the relegation zone so far. Last week they threw away a 2 goal lead against Yeovil, conceding twice in the last eight minutes.

The embarrassed driver spoke to us on condition of his anonymity. "This wasn't my fault - it was the sat-nav sold to me by former Lincoln manager John Beck - now a market trader in Brick Lane - he threw in a bottle of whiskey to swing the deal".

Amazingly, it emerged last night that this is the second time in a month this type of mistake has happened. On Easter Monday, the same driver took the players to St James Park in Newcastle instead of St James Park, Exeter. On that occasion O's boss Slade used 11 fans from a supporters coach and lost 3-0.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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