Written by Ossurworld
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Topics: Yankees, Red Sox

Monday, 9 April 2012

Both the Boston Red Sox and the New York Yankees have suffered the slings and arrows of stink bug bites.

The archrivals have matching records and no victories, moral or otherwise.

Managers Joe Girardi and Bobby Valentine share the same sentiment: that fans should not panic because there are 159 games left on the schedule.

Yes, those season ticketholders don't have much choice. They could have put the money into the Herman Cain for President campaign and won just as much.

The Red Sox have made former Yankee Alfredo Aceves their new high-pressure closer, and the Yankees have former high pressure closer Mario Rivera. Each one looks like the stink bug bite may have given them Bubonic Plague.

If you are counting on how many rats have bitten each respective team, you can take comfort that the Yankees seem to have fallen into the same gutter as the Red Sox.

Swept away in the first series is not the end of the world-but if you are looking for Pied Pipers, there seem to be a dearth in the age-old rivals.

Most people may be rooting for both teams to meet next week looking for their first win at the Titanic Memorial game at Fenway Park.

When Fenway celebrates its 100th season with the two rivals going at it, the question will be why did the iceberg hit both teams?

The real fun will arrive when Red Sox and Yankee players fight for the few seats left on the lifeboat.

Baseball fans may little note, nor long remember the opening to the 2012 season, but already the rats have deserted these sinking ships.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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