Written by Bill Licks
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Saturday, 31 March 2012

image for Mario Balotelli is not my son says Roberto Mancini
Tevez in training yesterday

Beleaguered Manchester City boss Roberto Mancini has admitted that contrary to popular belief, wayward striker Mario Baletolli is not his son.

'I do not know who started this rumour' said Mancini 'but I can confirm that although I know his mother very well I have never got so intimate with her that we could make a Mario together.'

In an exclusive interview with Oasis wild man Liam Gallagher, Mancini also confessed that he liked 80's pop duo Go West, could not stand the taste of Australian lager and that he found English shampoo confusing.'

'It makes my hair look too fly away' he told the reporter 'that is not a good look for a man in his middle ages.'

But the most shocking confession by the Italian came when Gallagher asked the question if prodigal striker Carlos Tevez had a hairier back than his brother Noel.

'His back is smoother than, how you say, a baby's backside? Maybe he waxes it or maybe he goes to the same hairdresser as Mario.'

'Maybe he has at last evolved into a human being after spending 6 months in South America.'

The full interview can be seen if you attend Salford Job Centre in the next few weeks.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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