New York City - Tim Tebow is coming to New York and those close to him are already painting the City as Sodom and Gomorrah. Instead, Tebow is being advised to jump on Interstate-95 and head south to Jersey, home of such whole television dramas as The Sopranos and Jersey Shore.
According to sources close to the Jets' new quarterback, friends feel that the City's underworldly influences and excessive nightlife would, over a matter of time, drag Tebow straight to hell.
For his part, Tebow seems unfazed by all the attention to the matter of where he ends up buying a home.
"I have to say that everyday Jersey folks have already reached out to me and made me feel welcome. I mean, just regular guys from the garbage removal companies and cement manufacturers have told me that if there's anything I need, I should give them a call and they won't let me down."
Tebow-Time is also more likely to be spent on the shore of the Garden State, and not in Soho.
"A lot of Italians must live in the area," said Tebow. "Guys called Castellucio, Ricigliano, and the like told me that there are some nice places in the shore towns where we can have really nice time."