Written by Jaggedone
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Sunday, 11 March 2012

image for Naked "Tour de Peru" causes sore bums and traffic chaos!
Peruvian pedaller practicing for next years "Gay naked Tour de Peru!"

Lima, Peru: As preperation for this years Tour de France pro-cyclists decided to go to Peru for the "Naked Tour de Peru". The reason why they cycled naked was to get their bums hardened for the long haul ahead in France. The trainers of the teams took the advice of sport scientists who suggested that "high altitude bum training" would be far better for hardening their bums than the Giro de Italia; they're soft there.

The cyclists, all naked, cycled through Lima, the capital, and brought the place to a standstill as indigenous natives dressed in their top hats, llamas and local coca chewers were flabbergasted at the sight of naked bodies on bikes, a thing never seen before in Peru.

The Lima traffic ground to a halt, also for a first time ever since the introduction of automobiles instead of using donkeys and llamas. A group of Indian wooden-flute musicians whistled a new version of Queen's "Fat bottomed girls on bicycles" and the whole event was a massive success!

After the medical teams had examined the riders bums it seems that "high altitude naked bike racing" is very good for the hardening of bums and immediately the "gay" Lima fraternity promised to hold a similar annual event called "Le Gay naked Tour de Peru" ( I wonder why?).

A passing llama gave it's opinion of the whole circus and "SPAT" accordingly!

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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