Written by Jaggedone
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Monday, 5 March 2012

image for Abramovich sacked more managers than Andre Villas-Boas had hot dinners!
Andre Villa-Boas joins the others who were not quite "The special One" and ended up headless!

Chelsea boss, Roman Abramovich, loves chopping heads off, in fact any manager who risks the wrath of the impatient Russian billionaire will be led to the chopping block and served up on his golden plate, cost what it will!

His latest victim Andre V-Boas, Portuguese wonder manager, but not quite a "Special One", had his head removed after failing to satisy his blood-thirsty owner, his entourage of ageing super-stars and £50 million failures.

In fact the long list of "headless" managers is longer than the list of fancy hot dinners had by AVB in posh London restaurants during his very short stay on the North-West Bank of the Thames.

A new candidate has appeared as a new victim of Abramovich's reign of terror, 95 year-old Chelsea pensioner, Fred Perkins, who has won more medals than all of the headless managers put together, albeit on a different war front. He has volunteered to take over proceedings at the club because no other footy manager with a level head would risk their life, reputation and head by attempting to satisfy " Tsar Rasputin Roman's" desire to own a successful football club.

Fred is being interviewed by Roman along with his earing aid tomorrow and it seems he has a good chance of steering Chelsea out of their present demise because Fred Perkins VC was one of the "Charging Light Brigade" and they certainly need someone with some balls to satisfy their success starved, very impatient owner!

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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