Written by Jaggedone
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Wednesday, 7 December 2011

image for Chicharito teaches Rooney how to pray on his knees before tomorrows' UEFA appeal hearing!
New hair and new image all thanks to Chicharito praying on his knees!

Chicharito and Wayne rooney have been secretly practicing how to look convincing whilst praying on their knees before important occasions. Rooney must go in front of a UEFA commission tomorrow in a bid to reduce his punishment for kicking an opponent in the butt.

His United team mate is a thorough professional in praying because he does it in front of millions before every game he plays. Wayne asked Chicho for some advice in how to look convincingly whilst on your knees, here is Chicho's advice:

"Wayne, tu sinka to your knees, crossa youra hands across youra chesta, cerrado los ojos and look up to Dios et he willa helpa you, yo estoy seguro!"

After practicing several times with Chicho, Rooney is now convinced he can prove to the UEFA commission he only had "un momento de Diablo et ahora is mucho sorry." Tomorrow Rooney will drop on his knees and plead with them to reduce the ban.

England manager Capello, a devout Catholic, has also promised to drop on his knees and all of the England fans who have bought tickets for next years Euro's will, in solidarity, also drop to their knees.

It promises to be one "hell" of a "Holy Intervention" tomorrow in Switzerland to save England and Rooney, AMEN!

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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