Written by Oscar Pearson
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Monday, 3 October 2011

image for Steve McClaren quits Forest even though it's been his most successful managerial stint
McClaren's balls have just got smaller

Steve McClaren has left Nottingham Forest even though the four months spent in charge of the club were his most successful to date. McClaren guided his side to no less than eight points in their opening ten matches of the season, averaging just under an enviable 1 point per game. And the news of his resignation has left supporters in despair:

"It's such a shame," spluttered 49 year-old Bobby Hanks, from the Nottingham Forest Supporters Trust. "He was doing so well. None of us here at Forest expected anything over four points with Steve in charge, but to get double that is incredible. He must have left because of personal issues - there was no logical reason to step down."

Forest are a whole four places above bottom-of-the-table Bristol City, and that means out of all his previous jobs, McClaren just gets better and better. Some footballers have even predicted that in the future, Steve McClaren might even be able to win a match.

It has been said that boos erupted after Forest's most recent home defeat to Birmingham at the final whistle. However, it is now known that the noise from the spectators wasn't booing - it was in fact numerous "Steeeeve"s showing support for the ex-manager.

Even though , in McClaren's 112 days in charge, Forest were unable to win at home, sat just one point above the relegation zone, and conceded 21 goals in the process, the ex-England manager had his best managerial spell ever.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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