Manchester City and Argentina forward Carlos Tevez has signed up former strike leader Arthur Scargill to organise a march in his name.
The scarfaced player is fed up with the backlash since his apparent refusal to play against Bayern Munich in the Champions League.
'I want braziers, banners and burning bras' Tevez protested in broken English. 'I grew up in Argentina in a villa miseria (shanty town)and Senor Scargill was an idol of mine and my amigos. I had a poster on my wall of the great man so hope he can make this dream happen for me and arrange a protest'.
Arthur Scargill is understood to have waived his fee in return for Carlos writing the forward on his new biography on the ginger one out of Girls Aloud.