Spoof news snippets from Tuesday 31 January 2017
Trump U. to Re-open
BREAKING NEWS: Betsy DeVos Approved as Secretary of Education, Trump U. to Re-open
(A cardboard cutout of Donald Trump is expected to teach a class in for-profit schools and Ponzi schemes.)
Milky Boobs being controlled at European Airports!
European Airports are doing "squeeze titty controls" on women entering from the Far East without babies but with tits full of milk and a pump! Trump is demanding to control all "pussies" too!
Humpty Trumpty cracks it!
All the Queens horses and all the Queens men will have to put Humpty Trumpty together again after Brexit because nobody else will touch him and they have nobody else to glue!
UK Healthcare Crisis!
Minister says not a bed available -- 'cept for that one tied to your Mum's back. Burn!!