Spoof news snippets from Sunday 31 August 2014
Whee TV's "show sure to be a "hit"
Whee TV's new show, "Sex Box," features couples doing the dirty in a cardboard box at various locations around London. ("Box," producers point out, is slang for "vagina," so it's a heterosexual show.)
Teachers sentenced for sex with students
A former female high school teacher received six months in jail for having sex with a male student, while a male teacher at the same school received a six-year sentence for bedding a coed pupil.
All-male "bikini coffee shop" busted
An all-male "bikini coffee shop" in Everett, WA, was busted after female customers complained that the "cream" in their coffee wasn't exactly cream--not the dairy kind, at any rate.
Al Pacino's latest blockbuster
In his portrayal of a "sick bastard" who enjoys sex with animals, Al Pacino "plays with pussies" in his latest film, "Mange Horny."
Airlines' plan to stop onboard "knee defender" fights
To prevent violence over passengers' defense of their knee space, airlines are now requiring above-the-knee amputations prior to passengers' boarding of aircraft--unless they've paid for first class.
Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt marry
Now that he's made an "honest woman" of Angelina, Brad says the "thrill" in their relationship is "gone."
Donald Trump Does Ice Bucket Challenge and Melts Away
"I've never seen anything like it-first his hair turned green and then he started to melt" said a bystander. "Just like the Wizard of Oz!" shouted another. Everyone then cheered for 2 hours straight.