Spoof news snippets from Monday 18 August 2014
Julian Assange looks like a dead ringer for Richard Branson
Nicotine-streaked grey hair and Hitler mustache a bit of a giveaway
Iceland volcano blows again
Guess that puts country's fracking plans on hold another 100 years or so
Reporting blackout over Cliff Richard's police interview
Judge even bans anyone tweeting 'it's so funny how we don't talk any more', threatens contempt proceedings
Accounting giant fined $25m for terrorist money laundering
Appeal lawyers will claim nobody suspected Brit royals of being on the Ten Most Wanted List.
New Jersey economy may warp Chris Christie's presidential buns. Uh, run, he ain't got buns.
Human frights activists repel Brunei Sultan's hotel bid
Bad enough having his brother Prince Jefri's mega yacht 'Tits' prowling Long Island Sound
WTF 'Brooklyn filmmaker reveals importance of using suntan lotion'
Someone forgot to smear the danglies at the nudist beach again?
Rafael Nadal pulls out early from US Open
New balls, please!
Global Nutella shortage after hazelnut harvest declared a disaster
No wonder those crazy jihadis Re going cold turkey all over the place
Trash Talk bassist shoots down spying drone above concert
Witnesses say the drone was hovering over the moshing pit stealing fans' marijuana spiffs
Assange plans midnight flit from Ecuadorian embassy asylum
Cops say he's been watching hundreds of reruns of Butch Cassidy & the Sundance Kid final scene
Medical examiner found marijuana in Michael Brown's system
Ok, Ok, there were also six bullets. Just sayin
Louis loses and Holland sinks without trace!
Dutch people are preparing for life having a loser at the helm of a once so successful, juggernaut. He was their last hope of achieving success and now it sinks in a North Sea storm, they need a dyke!
Betting scam: No conspiracy says £58,000 winner Icke
David Icke said 'Its NO conspiracy. Just luck' amid claims he had insider knowledge of the 1984 snooker World final. When asked why he thought Ladbrokes investigated the bet he said 'Its a conspiracy'