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NASA stored Brazilian metadata of millions of web users for one whole year

Eventually it was vaporized in deep space after ejection from International Space Station toilet

written by queen mudder, 30 September 2013
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Google used smartass accountants to avoid £150m UK tax

Expect imminent nomination for Nobel Fiction Prize

written by queen mudder, 30 September 2013
Rating:

Double whammy as Hillary Clinton TV mini-series and documentary back on cutting room floor

Studio bosses suggest she auditions for role in new remake of the Addams Family

written by queen mudder, 30 September 2013
Rating:

BP faces $18bn, fine

CEO redrafts statement, saying exorbitant charges 'definitely not fine'

written by queen mudder, 30 September 2013
Rating:

Space Station astronauts use robotic arms

New mechanical space guns are pre-programmed to shoot down alien craft

written by queen mudder, 30 September 2013
Rating:

Ex-Sun hack charged over mobile...

er, mobile home that is, forgot to get his road tax

written by queen mudder, 30 September 2013
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Duck boat fire on River Thames claims more fatalities

Nearly 200 mallards frazzled to cinders as surviving chicks vow to take the Tube next time

written by queen mudder, 30 September 2013
Rating:

Mortgage approvals his new fove year high

Borrowers increasingly using their loans to bankroll lucrative home-grown skunk farms

written by queen mudder, 30 September 2013
Rating:

Two ex-Popes to be made saints in April next year

That's April 1st, in case you wondered

written by queen mudder, 30 September 2013
Rating:

Sheikh McTomb-Raider orders emergency horse drugs seizure inquiry

Great idea! And the junior wife is carrying out the probe, just to keep it in the family.

written by queen mudder, 30 September 2013
Rating:

Turkish PM Recep Tayyip Erdogan removes ban on neckties

Anyone caught not wearing one will get five years and a very sore neck

written by queen mudder, 30 September 2013
Rating:

More human waste discovered in plush central London garden square

Locals are blaming Romanian migrants who were given free repatriation plane tickets home last month and are back with a vengeance

written by queen mudder, 30 September 2013
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Osborne aims for surplus of budgies by 2020

Think 'Surfeit of Lampreys' with bright yellow feathers to get his drift

written by queen mudder, 30 September 2013
Rating:

Tories promise to scrap Labour's Human Frights Act if re-elected

A replacement Tory Frights Act is being drafted as we go to press

written by queen mudder, 30 September 2013
Rating:

O'Bama... "Our Real Enemy".

Explaining cuts in Health Care O'Bama has announced; "CIA intelligence has at last unearthed our real enemy. It is not Islam as we thought. It is Christianity."

written by Auntie Matter, 30 September 2013
Rating:

Sven Gorran-Errikson puts himself forward for the England womens team job

"I have watched them play and they are very - how you say - very talented" said the bespectacled Swedish coach.
John Terry has offered to help with the coaching.

written by radiogagger, 30 September 2013
Rating:

Irish PM: right time, wrong place

The Irish Prime Minister has landed to a good reception at Paris Airport, which is fine considering he was intending to land at Heathrow Airport. An investigation is under way by the Foreign office.

written by whatinthe world, 30 September 2013
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