Spoof news snippets from Thursday 16 May 2013
History of Cross Dressing - part 1
Cross dressing in ancient times, before the invention of gender specific clothing, mainly involved shaving off the beard. This was considered a perversion by those who liked facial hair.
Arizona Governor Jan Brewer Achieves Orgasm
Ultra-Conservative Arizona Governor Jan Brewer says she achieved an orgasm last night as she was listening to Rush Limbaugh. "I really enjoyed it", Brewer stated.
Retirement 'Harmful To Health' Says The Institute For Economic Affairs (IEA)
'Also, poverty is healthy, but voting UKIP causes fatal illnesses,' said Mark Littlewood, IEA Director. 'The IEA is independent,' he added, 'we never manipulate public opinion to government agendas.'
News to hand
Mr Nigel Crackenthorpe of Lentle Lane Wandsworth has finally worked out how to enter his two bedroom home. He unlocked the front door and walked in. He now will work out how to get out again. Serious.
Poets to be deported
Budding poets are to be rounded up and excised from the general population in a PR move by the British government. "Yes, they will be shipped to South Georgia" said a spokesperson for David Cameron.
Hitler's love child
A Latvian bus driver has confessed to being the love child of Adolf Hitler and Marlene Dietrich. "Ya, I'm the one and only" he cried. The man has been detained in a psychiatric facility for some time.
Oh, to be in England...now that summer is here!
Snow in May: White stuff hits parts of UK.....meanwhile, the brown stuff continues to hit everywhere else!