Spoof news snippets from Friday 22 March 2013
Cyprus To Be Sold For Scrap
Cyprus's creditors have agreed to break the island up and sell it for scrap. The beaches have been sold on to Dubai, the remainder is to be moored in the South China Sea as a floating restaurant.
Power Company Websites Hacked
Some power company websites were hacked by their consumers due to lack of solutions to the on-going 4-hour rotational brownouts across the world.
Westboro Baptist Church Leaves USA
WBC plans on leaving the United States of America to head for a remote island. This is to ensure that they won't run out of members in the near future.
News Regarding The War Between The States
President Obama proudly announced today that the United States has made the final payment on the loan it took out in 1861 to help pay for the American Civil War.
Pat Robertson Condemns The New England Patriots
Pat Robertson said that the New England Patriots will go to hell for letting Wes Welker leave. Pats coach Bill Belichick said "Good, I'll kick the damn devil and record the whole damn thing to boot."
Lindsay Lohan Will Not Be Firing Her Lawyer
Lindsay Lohan has been advised by her close friends and family to fire her attorney, but she says that she will keep him because he works for the amazing fee of $19 an hour.
Arizona Passes A Crazy Law
Arizona has just announced that it has passed a bill prohibiting any one in the state from using the term Praying Mantis.
Ah, The Land of Cotton
Mississippi has just banned the photoshopping of cotton. No reason was given.