Spoof news snippets from Friday 7 September 2012
Prince Harry Sticks It out Again in Afghanistan
Las Vegas was just a practice! This time it's for real! Prince Harry gets his chopper out again - instead are being half cut, it's fully loaded!
Obama goes AWOl!
President Obama has gone AWOl because he hasn't moved a thing in 4 years and is sick of his own rhetoric so he decided to follow Dr. Livingstone and if you want to know where he is, ask Stanley!
Double Amputee Expelled From Paralympics
"He kept arsing about" a Games spokesperson said last night.
Move Over, Mr. Blackwell! Rajon Rondo Joins GQ
Gentleman's Quarterly, a fashion Bible, has hired Rondo to write about fashion. It must be his Star Trek jersey that sealed the job.
Souls of Nash, Howard found in Kobe Bryant's locker
A recent discovery by janitor Marty Rolfe has revealed the souls of Steve Nash and Dwight Howard are now in a mayonnaise jar in Kobe Bryant's locker.
No charges have been filed against Bryant.
UK: Number of youths jailed for knives falls
Within hte last 4 months, six firearm incidents, including three murders within a ten minute walk from where I live... no exist, this somehow offers little comfort or confidence to me!
Woman slices boyfriend's penis off!
After discovering he cheated on her. Then flushed it down the loo so it could not be sewn back on!
"Are you reading this Rooney?"
Man handcuffed teen and stuck lit firework up his arse!
Onlookers laughed at the sobbing victim before the banger was removed without going off.
The 15-year-old had repeatedly knocked on Stephen Gregory's door and run away.
"Way to go!"
Cannabis dealer allowed to keep luxuries!
He was told he could keep his household luxuries after claiming he paid for them with his £14,400-a-year state handouts.
"Good old British justice! Hah!"
Victoria Pendleton's Frustrated Boyfriend Hits Out.
"She always seemed to be on her bloody cycle!" he said last night.