Spoof news snippets from Monday 24 September 2012
Research has found that texting while driving is the "top risk" at the wheel. Nah it's probably blowjobs a risk but a risk worth taking.
15 plus 30 = 69
Inseine's BOOK OF THE DAY 138
M T Tank
A Victim of "Afghan Belly"
After suffering a bout of what she thought was "Afghan Belly" turned out to be a newborn baby boy for a Lance Cpl in Camp Bastian. "At least it's not terminal." An MoD spokesman said
Clarissa Dickson-Wright Is Writing New Recipe Book
Food author and chef, Clarissa Dickson-Wright is in the middle of writing a new recipe book on badgers. Gordon Ramsay was heard to say: "badgers, badgers… We don't need any stinking badgers!"
No.10 Supports Police Rage Minister.
In a statement David Cameron said "If I had to sack every public school tosser in the government when they looked down at the proletariat there would only be Vince Cable left."
New game from Master Bates games
Master Bater games have released their latest family game, Boarddom. "It's very easy to play," said creator, Clive Damnton. "You get tied to a board with a gimp mask on, and left for 12 hours."
Lib Dem conference podium to be enlarged.
The podium at the Lib Dem Conference is to be made larger before Nick Clegg's keynote speech to prevent the audience and TV viewers catching sight of David Cameron puppeteering.