Order by:
Rating:

GPS Tracking Disaster: Japanese Tourists Drive Straight into the Pacific!

"I tell driver, it looks deep", stated student who was riding in the back.

written by Bureau, 17 March 2012
Rating:

Papers reveal Thatcher kept Reagan's drawings from summit!

"Apparently he thought he was well-endowed!" she stated at the time.

written by Bureau, 17 March 2012
Rating:

'Don't Re-Nig,' the racist anti-Obama bumper sticker, appears real!

"So is the Mor-Mon-y Than Sense!"

written by Bureau, 17 March 2012
Rating:

Investigation Into Several NCAA Teams Continues

That dark cloud you're seeing hanging over the NCAA basketball coaches is the revelation that several top college players have failed Pig Latin II, yet continue to be allowed to play.

written by Bureau, 17 March 2012
Rating:

Bad Headline Number 96:

VOLUNTEERS NEEDED FOR SUICIDE PROGRAM

written by IN SEINE, 17 March 2012
Rating:

Bad Headline Number 95:

POLICE SEEK VANDALS FOR GRAFFITI WORK

written by IN SEINE, 17 March 2012
Rating:

Farrakhan Blames Jews for Ancient Slavery

They MADE those Egyptians put them into slavery just to get everyone's sympathy!

written by Bureau, 17 March 2012
Rating:

Funniest One That of Jimmy Carter Chased By A Rabbit

Margaret Thatcher managed to take possession of a set of doodles drawn by President Ronald Reagan during her time as prime minister.

written by Bureau, 17 March 2012
Rating:

Hunt On For New Archbishop Of Canterbury

'An intelligent, thoughtful scholar in post didn't work,' said an Anglican spokesman. 'We need a not too bright fundamentalist. Those with simple beliefs will approve, and others will show tolerance.'

written by Swan Morrison, 17 March 2012
Rating:

Pope opens internal investigation into leaks!

Anyone seen facing a wall up-close or discovered squatting behind a bush anywhere near the Vatican will be arrested.

written by Bureau, 17 March 2012
Rating:

Beat The Bishop

Archbishop of Canterbury steps down.....gets better job offer at Poundland.

written by Herrdoktorfox, 17 March 2012
Rating:

Guinea-Bissau has heads on poles after leader's death!

I'm sorry, that should be 'Guinea-Bissau heads to polls after leader's death!'

written by Bureau, 17 March 2012
Rating:

Gingrich Talks Politics at the Zoo!

Takes a direct hit from big gorilla. Leaves to go take shots.

written by Bureau, 17 March 2012
Rating:

Man arrested, barred from city bus stops for being 'annoying'!

Al Gore claims that he was only trying to warn everyone about global warming.

written by Bureau, 17 March 2012
Rating:

GOP primary heads offshore!

To regroup...spend a little time with their money.

written by Bureau, 17 March 2012
Rating:

Obama's search for a conservative justice to save his health-care law!

"It's getting harder and harder to turn down ten million dollars and a roll in next George Clooney film", says Justice Thomas.

written by Bureau, 17 March 2012
Rating:

White House Spokesman Denies It!

A White House spokesman stated this morning that it is not true that all the people who attended Obama event this week had to kiss his ring.

written by Bureau, 17 March 2012
Rating:

"Obama The Magnificent!"

President Obama to play himself in new campaign movies!

written by Bureau, 17 March 2012
Rating:

Hollywood to make film of stud muffin Ken Barlows love life

Jack Nicholson and Russell Brand rumoured to be up for the part of Ken.

written by radiogagger, 17 March 2012
Rating:

George Clooney arrested in Sudan.

Russel Brand arrested in LA.
Actor shortage means call ups from the UK for Joe Swash and Ken Barlow.

written by radiogagger, 17 March 2012
Rating:

New hotel dedicated to comedy opens.

Called The Harry Hilton.

written by radiogagger, 17 March 2012
Rating:

Athletico Bilbao 2 Man United 1

Better than losing to Wigan Athletico I suppose.

written by radiogagger, 17 March 2012
Rating:

Nuclear Weapons To Be Reduced

President Obama and President Putin to discuss destroying one-third of nuclear arsenal. "It's good for everyone", says President Obama. "At least a third of ours have been leaking for years."

written by Bureau, 17 March 2012
Rating:

Sanofi to buy LeGoo maker Pluromed!

That's according to Dr Seuss!

written by Bureau, 17 March 2012
Rating:

NASA postpones launch of X-ray telescope!

Also, cancels launch of giant magnifying glass after UN outcry!

written by Bureau, 17 March 2012
Rating:

Libya confirms Gaddafi intelligence chief arrested!

Most of the world reacts with: "Gaddafi had an intelligence chief?"

written by Bureau, 17 March 2012
Rating:

Norfolk State, Lehigh lead memorable day of upsets!

Monkey with dart board jumps into the lead on March Madness predictions!

written by Bureau, 17 March 2012
Rating:

Oprah Winfrey's OWN network axes 'The Rosie Show'

"Host seemed to think she knew everything and everybody..unlike our Oprah!", says released statement.

written by Bureau, 17 March 2012
Rating:

Must Be Taught in Classes!

Utah governor vetoes bill to curb sex education in schools bathrooms!

written by Bureau, 17 March 2012
Rating:

500,000 people pack Dublin for St. Patrick's Day!

Deny rumor going around that a few of them are drunk as a skunk! "May yore snake drop away froom ye fer sech a thot!"

written by Bureau, 17 March 2012
Rating:

George Clooney arrested in front of Sudanese Embassy

"He's In The Jailhouse Now!"


written by Bureau, 17 March 2012
Rating:

Cameron loses it

"Hey, that's my briefcase!" cried an exasperated British PM David Cameron as a street urchin stole his personal case whilst the UK leader ate at a restaurant. Cameron will hunt down and kill the guy.

written by whatinthe world, 17 March 2012
Rating:

A New' Star

Apple cements tablet market lead with new iPad in front of Grauman's Chinese Theatre forecourt,

written by Bureau, 17 March 2012
Rating:

Matador Gored Through Face Makes Comeback

Juan Jose Padilla the 38-year-old was injured when the bull's horn ripped into his lower jaw and emerged next to his eyeball.

"Some blokes are more horny than others it seems!"

written by Inchcock, 17 March 2012
Rating:

Abandoned Fukushima Pets Face Harsh Winter

Pets bandoned in the Fukushima exclusion zone after last year's nuclear crisis, have survived high radiation and lack of food, only to face freezing winter conditions!

"Life's 'orrible sometimes!"

written by Inchcock, 17 March 2012
Rating:

79-year-old Lottery winner in Nottingham

He said in the local newspaper:
"Funny innit, how I've been struggling on me own fer years, un suddenly everyone wants to help and talk to me - **** em all!

written by Inchcock, 17 March 2012
Rating:

A Quid Pro Quo

A citizen of Maryland asked the Democratic governor to scratch an itch he had, while the governor had his hand in the taxpayer's pocket taking new taxes to cover previous mismanagement of funds!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 17 March 2012
Rating:

I Knew Nothing

President Obama has shut down drilling for oil/gas on US government land, off coastal shores, in Alaska and the Gulf of Mexico. Yet the president claims he is not responsible for high gasoline prices!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 17 March 2012
Rating:

The Great Divider

President Obama has divided the American public on every economic and social issue that he gets involved in. The question then, is he incompetent or actually trying to destroy the USA!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 17 March 2012
Rating:

Latest Scientific Poop

Veterinarians have discovered that during house-training, puppies prefer liberal newspapers to conservative newspapers to do their business on!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 17 March 2012
Rating:

Heredity is Responsible

Maryland's Democratic governor had ancestors who were horse thieves. Heredity then explains why the governor keeps taking the funds from the Transportation Trust Fund to use for other things!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 17 March 2012
Rating:

Where's the Water?

From a non-Californian's prospective it appears that more political BULLSHIT is flowing between Congressional Republicans and Democrats than water flowing to drought stricken farmers.

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 17 March 2012
Rating:

Lost on Planet Earth

Webster's International Dictionary defines clueless as being the Obama administration's foreign policy towards Afghanistan. They have no idea how Afghani's think and that gets US troops killed!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 17 March 2012
Rating:

Geography Lesson

The latest edition of Encyclopedia Britannica indicates that Afghanistan may be the anus of the world, although Iran, Iraq and North Korea are also suspect!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 17 March 2012
Rating:

There's a Name for That

Male Occupy Washington DC protestors in favor of female contraceptives are planning to demonstrate outside the US Capitol by wearing condoms over their heads!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 17 March 2012
Rating:

Missed Something

Undocumented children of illegal immigrants ask congress to give them in-state college tuition rates. Seems a high school class in the US Constitution, 10th amendment, was missed!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 17 March 2012
Rating:

Loves Those Gyros

President Obama, who likes European socialism, is planning to move to Greece after he leaves office in January 2013!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 17 March 2012
Rating:

Dolphins are Smart

The dolphins at Sea World have told PETA to leave them alone and to donate all the money collected by PETA to help US children who haven't got enough food to eat!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 17 March 2012
Rating:

Say a Prayer for the New Guy

When President Obama leaves office in January 2013, 40 million Americans will be unemployed, gasoline will be $6.00 per gallon and 20,000 new regulations will be in place!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 17 March 2012
Rating:

No Taxpayer Money Will be Involved, Maybe

President Obama plans to work for Goldman Sachs, as a venture capitalist, after he leaves office in January 2013 based on his Solyndra experience!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 17 March 2012
Rating:

Render Unto Caesar

Twenty eight states have figured out how to allow church and religious institutions exceptions for conflicts of conscious with government mandates. Only the leader of the free world remains befuddled!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 17 March 2012
Rating:

Overregulation Perhaps

Military standards tried to aid in the design of military equipment built by private contractors, yet federal government regulations tend to hinder private businesses, energy companies, banks etc!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 17 March 2012
Rating:

Premier League Managers survey

Two thirds think Man City will win title.
Most say Spurs are best team to watch.
Kenny Dalglish mumbles the most.

written by radiogagger, 17 March 2012
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