Richard Branson suggests decriminalisation of drugs
Kind of explains all his air balloon accidents...
Herman Cain endorses Newt Gingrich
"He's been through the sausage maker recently."
Well that's one way of putting it...
Novak Djokovic wins Australian Open after six hour final
And a five hour semi-final.
When are they introducing a Twenty20 version of tennis?
Dancing On Ice cancelled.
Somebody left the heating on overnight.
'Fewer, better' immigrants to be allowed into UK
Euromillions lottery winners?
Banks close to agreeing Greece debt package
And in return the Greeks have promised to stop smashing the plates.
Willets: Labour Is Out Of Touch On Benefits
Universities Minister David Willits states Labour is 'out of touch' on Benefits; mate in case you have not noticed they are not even on this Planet when it comes to any form of lateral thinking!
Red Ken-can't cut it!
Would be London Mayor (again)'Red' Ken Livingstone pledges to bring back 1,700 Police from Mayoral £30bn budget and 'slash' fares by 7%...steady on there Ken, don't overdo it cobber...a whole 7% wow!!
Demi Moore 911 Tape:
.."She smoked something" wailed voice, to right cobber and I bet it was not a kipper from Morrison's fish counter!
Redknapp, Burlusconi and Ninja Turtle in Cowabunga, Bunga-Bunga Bung party
Harry Redknapp was caught up in further scandal to day when it emerged that he had been seen stepping out with with former Italian Prime Minister Silvio Burlusconi and former Ninja Turtle Leonardo at
Walmart - The Proven Leader In Shopping Innovations
Walmart in an effort to cut back on expenses has decided to reduce its number of shopping carts by 20 percent. They plan to air commercials asking shoppers to please share carts with other shoppers.
Alec Baldwin Could Soon Become A "Non-Flyer"
Alec Baldwin has been banned by yet a third airline. If this keeps up he may end up having to travel from Los Angeles to New York City by Greyhound Bus.
The Occupy Wall Street Movement Welcomes Everyone
The oldest Occupy Wall Street protester is 97-years-old. When he was asked why he is protesting he replied, "Why is who protesting what?"
Rep. Barney Frank Clears Up The Rumor
Rep. Barney Frank says that the rumor that he wants to adopt Clay Aiken is false. He then added that it's Adam Lambert that he wants to adopt.
The GOP Presidential Debates Are Now In Reruns
Well it has now become official. The GOP Presidential Debates are even more boring than those tacky All-State "Mayhem" commercials.
Michele Bachmann Is Once Again A Very Happy Female
Michele Bachmann says she is happy that she decided to drop out of the Republican race because now she no longer has to answer any questions on her silly-as-hell looking hairdo.
Liverpool re-inroduce slave-ships!
Liverpool council have signed a billion dollar deal with eastern European slave-drivers to use their docks, the reason why the slave drivers chose Liverpool was easy: Scousers love a "back-hander"!
Police numbers down 6,800 to 10-year low in Tory cuts!
How many more victims will there be before MPs realise that people are afraid to go out at night for fear of being mugged, or stay at home for fear of being burgled?
"Cameron... you're a nepotist!"