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London to get another airport

When London's new airport opens, it will increase passenger capacity to just over three million. "We should be able to evacuate quite quickly," said Boris Johnson. "In case there's another fire."

written by IainB, 18 January 2012
Rating:

A Very Cheap Chinese Version of Expensive Mobile Phone on Market

The Chinese have ripped off the BlackBerry mobile phone. It is red and very tacky. Of course, it's name is… The Raspberry. You should hear it's ring tone.

written by IN SEINE, 18 January 2012
Rating:

Latest Unemployment figures,

118,000 people out of work between Sept-Nov 2011, but fear not.Get them selling the BIG ISSUE then they can claim all manner of benefits under the guise of being 'self employed'it works for Romanians

written by Herrdoktorfox, 18 January 2012
Rating:

Peacocks go into Administration.

Clothing Chain Peacocks has finally bit the dust with the loss of up to 9,000 jobs, soon the UK high streets will be littered with nothing but new job centres-all needing MORE staff-problem solved!

written by Herrdoktorfox, 18 January 2012
Rating:

Student rejects Oxford University!

A wee lassie student has sent a letter of rejection to Oxford University after being rejected because she's not a privileged, spoilt, snob and even if was accepted she'd still tell them to "Fuck Off!"

written by Jaggedone, 18 January 2012
Rating:

Headless in Hollywood!

An Armenian gentleman has gone headless in Hollywood. It was last seen being kicked about by two dogs near the Hollywood sign. Hitchcock is filming the crime scene!

written by Jaggedone, 18 January 2012
Rating:

Katy Perry becomes a sim...

ple girl

written by radiogagger, 18 January 2012
Rating:

Just 24 people from Salford have been given jobs at BBC North

and they're all security guards.

written by radiogagger, 18 January 2012
Rating:

Yahoo co-founder Jerry Yang resigns all positions

Expected to be replaced by Paul Scholes.

written by radiogagger, 18 January 2012
Rating:

Ian Hislop appears at Leveson inquiry

has Angus Deayton been invited too?

written by radiogagger, 18 January 2012
Rating:

Wikipedia goes offline for 24 hours to protest at SOPA

Err, i was gonna explain what SOPA is but couldn't wikipedia it...

written by radiogagger, 18 January 2012
Rating:

Women have sex for 237 reasons according to a new book

Sadly this spoof writers name wasn't one of them

written by radiogagger, 18 January 2012
Rating:

Holly willoughby confuses sex act with cheese on live tv

careful Holly you might give Antony Worral Thompson ideas

written by radiogagger, 18 January 2012
Rating:

Ed Miliband - We Cannot reverse Coalition cut-backs!

Gaurdian on-line

"Well I am amazed!"

written by Inchcock, 18 January 2012
Rating:

Two-faced David Cameron is a Con-man!

Reports the Daily Mail on-line.

"We know that - tell us how to stop him please!"

written by Inchcock, 18 January 2012
Rating:

Government announces: 2 Years Sentence, if sub-let Council Homes

But if MPs fiddle thousands of pounds on expense claims for second home etc, they get a telling off, and their expense limits increased!!!!

"Nepotist gits!"

written by Inchcock, 18 January 2012
Rating:

New evidence of Tory plans to privatise NHS by stealth!

Government sent letters to primary care trusts demanding they identify at least 3 services that can be handed to the private sector.

Cameron breaking his pledges again!

"Why am I not surprised!"

written by Inchcock, 18 January 2012
Rating:

Nick Clegg in Nottingham

I went along to a Nottingham Lib Dem supporters event at the weekend.

Neither of them spoke to me!

written by Inchcock, 18 January 2012
Rating:

Tebow awakens with post stress traumatic disorder

Tim Tebow awoke today in a cold sweat convinced that the 45-10 loss to the Patriots this past weekend was nothing but a nightmare. After running around the house screaming, he googled the cold truth.

written by Lyndon, 18 January 2012
Rating:

No Difference

LONE RANGER: What's the difference between Democratic liberal left politicians and Wall Street protesters? TONTO: Nothing, both groups want to keep their hands in US taxpayer's pockets!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 18 January 2012
Rating:

New Democratic Election PAC Formed

DNC Chair Debbie Wasserman Schultz, Rep. Pelosi (D-CA) and Senate Majority Leader Reid (D-NV) have encouraged a new group, the Pee Party, to support President Obama's piss-poor decision making!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 18 January 2012
Rating:

Alternate Approach Proposed

Maryland's Democratic governor has backed off on raising the state's "flush tax" to pay for sewer and septic system improvements. He is advocating Sh*tless Tuesdays in FY 2013!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 18 January 2012
Rating:

Here's Hoping They're Wrong

Las Vegas odds makers are betting that President Obama wimps-out facing down threats from Iran about closing the Strait of Hormuz.


written by Philbert of Macadamia, 18 January 2012
Rating:

Ultimate Hypocrisy

Syria kills 5,000 of its Arab citizens, Sunni Muslims blow up Shiite Muslims, Christians (Arabs) and Jews. The Arab street is silent, but let a non-Muslim kill a Muslim and the Arab street erupts!




written by Philbert of Macadamia, 18 January 2012
Rating:

Debbie Does Dallas

During a trip to Dallas Texas, DNC Chair Debbie Wasserman Schultz indicated she is not happy with Texas Republican Governor Rick Perry's plan to replace Social Security.



written by Philbert of Macadamia, 18 January 2012
Rating:

It Could be Different from Shinola

The food police say that eating sh*t can be hazardous to a person's health. Democratic liberals call for a study by the FDA to investigate the premise!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 18 January 2012
Rating:

No Animals Will be Injured

President Obama has approved the US Navy's request to use PETA members to hunt mines should Iran close the Strait of Hormuz. The PETA members will not be responsible for destroying the mines.



written by Philbert of Macadamia, 18 January 2012
Rating:

New Disease Discovered

Democrats have been diagnosed with a non-fatal but debilitating disease, Pelosi-itis. Symptoms are loss of memory, extremities morphing to the left, insider trading & making up fictitious excuses!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 18 January 2012
Rating:

Romney does creative math on low turnout for his latest rally

Despite a half-hour delay in hopes more people would arrive, only 100 supporters showed up for an 8:30 a.m. rally in South Carolina for Mitt Romney today, or as he would say, "Closer to 25,000".

written by Paris Silton, 18 January 2012
Rating:

Romney does creative math on low turnout for his latest rally

Despite a half-hour delay in hopes more people would arrive, only 100 supporters showed up for an 8:30 a.m. rally in South Carolina for Mitt Romney today, or as he would say, "Closer to 25,000".

written by Paris Silton, 18 January 2012
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