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Bad Headline Number 88

Health Department Wants Mayor's Ear

written by IN SEINE, 20 September 2011
Rating:

Republicans, Jews forced to like one another in midst of Obama's stance on Palestinian statehood bid

The GOP and Jews aren't hating on one another recently, with both giving President Obama grief on his stance on Palestine. It's unclear if they will elevate the relationship to "strange bedfellows".

written by Lyndon, 20 September 2011
Rating:

17 year-old Robin Hood in Germany gives himself up!

An English boy lost in the German woods around Berlin lived the life of Robin Hood with his dead dad, Little John, and now he's given up because his green tights were too small!

written by Jaggedone, 20 September 2011
Rating:

Sarah Palin Speaks Her Moose Hunting Mind

Sarah Palin said that she did not watch the last GOP Presidential Debate or as she called it The Legend of Snow White and The Seven Dwarfs.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 20 September 2011
Rating:

Michele Bachmann Forgot Just Exactly Where The Hell She Was

Michele Bachmann's Hair Spray Across The Nation Bus Tour stopped in Milwaukee where she told a crowd she plans to close down the beer breweries. Police quickly dragged her ass back on the bus.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 20 September 2011
Rating:

Jon Huntsman Denies The Rumor That He Does Not Run His Household

Jon Huntsman said that he had to take a day off from his political campaigning due to the fact that it was his day to do the laundry and vacuum the house.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 20 September 2011
Rating:

Mrs. Ron Paul Has Gotten Used To The Peace and Quiet

Rick Perry stated that when he gets through kicking the other seven candidates asses, they'll all go running back to their wives and families. Mrs. Ron Paul reportedly said, "Thanks Rick. Shit!"

written by Abel Rodriguez, 20 September 2011
Rating:

Cheryl Cole to join West Ham

Celebrity wife of Carlton Cole, Cheryl, is to join her striker husband in a new two pronged attattack following West Ham's 0-0 draw v Millwall. Their goal is to score on the pitch.

written by j.w., 20 September 2011
Rating:

Electric Companies in for a Shock

Chris Huhne, Energy Secretary, has got tough on Power Companies. They are to be gassed or electrocuted if they put prices up again - unless they think increases are unavoidable.

written by j.w., 20 September 2011
Rating:

Dates sold off

Dates which had gone past their best were being sold off at bargain prices at supermaarkets today.

written by j.w., 20 September 2011
Rating:

Vick claims decision to summer in Afghanistan on the up and up

Michael Vick claims his decision to spend future summers in Afghanistan has nothing to do with the fact that dog fighting there, although technically illegal, is a major gambling sport.

written by Lyndon, 20 September 2011
Rating:

Ethnic Warfare for Democratic Votes

Crybaby in Chief Obama, speaking to the Congressional Hispanic Caucus Institute blames the DREAM act failure on Republicans. First he plays the race card, then class warfare card & now ethnicity card!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 20 September 2011
Rating:

Commissar Obama Creates a Socialist State

The president's plan is to tax the rich entrepreneurs/job creators, print & spend money, promote racial & ethnic hostility, & over regulate to further destroy jobs, thus strangling the US economy!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 20 September 2011
Rating:

Fairness Doctrine

LONE RANGER: President Obama wants rich people to pay their fair share. TONTO: If this clueless president were to pay his fair share, he would resign for speaking with a forked tongue!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 20 September 2011
Rating:

President Obama's Vision

Obama wants to spend the assets of all 308 million Americans. One administration official acknowledged that the plan represented the president's "vision," and not a "legislative compromise."


written by Philbert of Macadamia, 20 September 2011
Rating:

You Thought China Was Bad Enough

2011 has been a busy year for UFO sightings, especially those coming from Mars. WH Press Secretary Carney indicated the Martians are only keeping an eye on the $4 billion they loaned Pres. Obama!


written by Philbert of Macadamia, 20 September 2011
Rating:

What No Greek Olives

President Obama tries to keep Greece from defaulting by buying 1000 years worth of Ouzo, Pita, Moussaka, Baklava, Stuffed Grape Leaves, Souflaki, Tzatziki Sauce, Lamb & Olive Oil for the WH pantry!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 20 September 2011
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