The Reds bounce back after the City debacle - Man Utd 3 - Aldershot 0
Incidentally the Reds players earned £39,900 for the match, the Aldershot guys £999!
Slumdog millionaire becomes reality!
A real slumdog millionaire has just won India's version of "Who want's to be a millionaire"! He has promised to spend his money on a good cause; Get the fuck out of there!
Chinese ordered not to watch entertaining TV!
The Chinese government has ordered its people not to watch entertaining TV, instead live films of Giant Panda bears mating will be shown, much more natural, but it could cause a baby boom!
Floods threaten Bangkok red light area!
Floods are threatening Bangkok's red light district, sex tourists were last seen swimming on their back trying to keep their nuts dry.
EU debt crisis is over, Greece has disappeared!
The EU debt crisis has been resolved, Greece has suddenly disappeared, it's now called Atlantis!
Perry promises 2.5 million non-paying jobs if elected
Rick Perry said he will create 2.5 million non-paying jobs, if elected. "I think just having a job is better than getting paid." Perry announced to his wife this morning.
Depressed Corporation in Therapy, Again
ExxonMobil is depressed again, it only made five billion dollars in profits in the third quarter. So ExonMobile is getting therapy for the depression it is feeling. Corporation hurt, too.
Rick Perry Wants Flat Tax to go with Flat World
Rick Perry thinks the world is flat and so should taxes. "Flat is beautiful." Rick Perry said in Parade magazine.
Amy Winehouse was never dry, in fact she drowned in it!
A London coroner has confirmed the fact that Amy Winehouse drowned in her own drink and the only time she was really dry was after towelling down after a swim in the bath.
Gaddafi now a burger
Colonel Gaddafi's remains were shipped from Libya today to a McDonald's Restaurant in Bolton for filleting and sale as a new hamburger. The burger, called a Big Gad, is expected to sell well here.
Like daughter like father: toss-up as to whose mugshot is uglier
As if our prisons had room to spare, yet another Lohan is taking horribly ugly mugshots and sucking up prison resources. Michael Lohan, 51, said, "Ugly or not, I'm back in the news."
written by Lyndon
, 26 October 2011
The award for the best all round angle for 2011 goes to 360 degrees! Congratulations.
written by IainB
, 26 October 2011
PETA Is Not Welcome In Louisiana
PETA is really getting carried away. They have just announced that they will be in New Orleans conducting a "Save The Mosquitoes" protest.
Herman Cain - The Man With An Eye For Detail
Mitt Romney is furious that most of the other GOP presidential candidates think that he is wearing a toupee. Herman Cain told him he knows it's not a toupee because a toupee doesn't have dandruff.
Arkansas Knows How To Get Her Citizens To Exercise
The Arkansas state legislature in an effort to get its citizens to exercise more has just passed a bill which bans television remote controls.
Rick Santorum Shows Why He Should Be Elected President
Rick Santorum was asked why voters should pick him to be president of the United States. He said because he is excellent at making home improvements and he will make all of the White House furniture.
Michele Bachmann Will Make Her Decisions Based On Her Period
Michele Bachmann recently stated that Global Warming is nothing more than voodoo, nonsense, hokum, and a hoax. When asked why she felt that way she smiled and replied, "Feminine intuition."
Tiger Woods - The Man Is Desperate To Get His 'Game' Back
Tiger Woods recently stated that in the interest of trying to change his bad luck he is seriously thinking about dating a black woman.