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Dave's sister channel

Popular Freeview channel, Dave, is to launch it's sister channel: Tracey.

written by IainB, 28 November 2011
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Spelling is important

Kids all across the developing world need education, they are being lured into sweatshops looking for chocolate and toffees.

written by IainB, 28 November 2011
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New Underwear Range

The Spoof will soon be launching it's underwear range called Business Briefs. "I'm not sure whether they're for men or women," said editor Mark, "but sod it, nobody knows what goes in it anyway."

written by IainB, 28 November 2011
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Longest lasting fries on the planet

Macdonald's unveils new billboard campaign in Chicago area featuring giant boxes of fries. Macdonald's french fries under cushions of Chicago area sofas expected to last longer than ad campaign.

written by The San Francisco Onion, 28 November 2011
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Dark night rides for Christian Bale

After lasting longer in the role than any other actor, Christian Bale has confirmed that he will be giving up his Batman cape, but he has decided to keep the car.

written by The San Francisco Onion, 28 November 2011
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Computer monitors cause eye damage

Companies expect employees to spend about half a day - four hours - shopping online while at work this week. This year, many companies will be monitoring internet use and pepper spraying accordingly.

written by The San Francisco Onion, 28 November 2011
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NHS feed patients with "lethally" expensive Asian foods!

NHS are investing millions by importing their food from Asia. It is a deadly expensive project, but in the long-run lethally cheap. The quicker the patients are poisoned the quicker they're out!

written by Jaggedone, 28 November 2011
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Come on Down, the price is right!

George 'Abacus' Osborne seen staggering down Carnaby Street this afternoon pissed as a coot. "Gorra find some couwage from somewheres" he gurgled,"afore tomoooroows biggie fivenancials annoncmints"

written by Herrdoktorfox, 28 November 2011
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Tabloid Press Confident That Leveson Will Exonerate Them As Paragons Of Ethics, Honesty and Decency

'At least that's what we're going to print, regardless of his actual conclusions,' said a spokesman for the tabloids. 'If he is foolish enough to criticise us, we'll get him!'

written by Swan Morrison, 28 November 2011
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Lib Dems announce image consultation

The Lib Dems have announced a consultation to boost the party's image. Experts suggest a selection of business suits from the new M&S Ultimate Performance range for a smart/contemporary look.

written by Garry Lee, 28 November 2011
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A fighting chance - Johnson's new strategy for Olympic gold

The recent announcement that females in the UK are the most obese in the EU has coincided with the setup of new training courses in female sumo wrestling to increase chances of Olympic gold in 2012.

written by Garry Lee, 28 November 2011
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Bye-Bye To The Dreaded Black Friday

President Obama saying that in the interest of avoiding all of the needless violence that "Black Friday" caused he will move to replace it with "Green Saturday."

written by Abel Rodriguez, 28 November 2011
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Many NBA Fans Are Feeling Angry and Disrespected

The NBA owners and players have reached a tentative agreement to end the NBA lockout. But many fans feel that NOW it is time for a "Fan Lockout" to send the rich owners and players a message.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 28 November 2011
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The Reason Paris Hilton's Perfume Was Taken Off The Market

Paris Hilton's perfume Eau Du Conceited Bitch has just been taken off the market due to wide scale protests from conceited bitches.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 28 November 2011
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Osborne's Autumn Statement Leak

I'm pissing against a wall!

written by j.w., 28 November 2011
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Osborne's Autumn Statement

Something is falling - it must be the leaves.

written by j.w., 28 November 2011
Rating:

So Farewell Ken Russell

Ann Margret in beans and chocolate...mmmmm. Brilliant!

written by Ellis Ian Fields, 28 November 2011
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Osborne proposes deficit reduction scheme

George Osborne has announced a drastic deficit reduction scheme. A referendum will be held to decide whether to bet the winter fuel allowance on red or black at a local casino.

written by Garry Lee, 28 November 2011
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2 obese female serial killers crush their victims to death!

Ramsbottom, Lancashire: 2 very obese ladies have been found guilty of a series of occult murders. After a night of hot fatty bacon sex they would crush their male, skinny victims to death, OUCH!

written by Jaggedone, 28 November 2011
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Pepper Spraying Is Getting Out of Hand

A Black Friday shopper at a Yuma, Arizona Walmart was pepper sprayed by an employee when he tried to return a pair of defective Nike's he had purchased earlier in the day.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 28 November 2011
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Air Force One's Name Will Be Changed For One Week

President Obama has said that in honor of Hip Hop Week he has agreed to change the name of Air Force One to Air Force It Be The One Bro.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 28 November 2011
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John "Pepper Spray" Pike Has Become Quite Paranoid

Officer John "Pepper Spray" Pike has received so many threats since pepper spraying the University of California students that he is even wearing his Kevlar bullet proof vest while in the shower.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 28 November 2011
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Penn State University Has Some Brand New Signs

The state of Pennsylvania has just required that Penn State University put up signs on their campus that read, "No male children allowed within 500 feet of the campus."

written by Abel Rodriguez, 28 November 2011
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Vice President Joe Biden Says His New Puppy's Name Stays

Vice President Joe Biden says that he does not care one bit what Michele Bachmann or Rick Santorum say he is not going to change the name of his brand new Boston Terrier puppy Republican't.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 28 November 2011
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Herman Cain Is Reaching Out (Oops)

Herman Cain doing a little more damage control has promised that if he is elected president he will not harass any Federal female employees; especially the white blonde ones.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 28 November 2011
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Nottingham Special Constable hit by car, leg broken in three places

Her leg was broken in three places when she was struck by a car in Shakespeare Street while attending a disturbance, says she is determined to be back on patrol as soon as possible.

"Good for her, well done gal!"



written by Inchcock, 28 November 2011
Rating:

NASA does it again

A team of NASA scientists have come up with a better way of keeping warm in the winter months. Head south of the equator, down South America way! The cost is little and you'll be cold free. Thanks.

written by whatinthe world, 28 November 2011
Rating:

Black Death in Nottingham

1348, the population of Nottingham was 3000 people, half which dies in the epidemic.

Today we have 20,524 claiming Jobseekers allowance, who's hopes have died!

written by Inchcock, 28 November 2011
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