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IMF Abbreviation Clarified

Its short for "I Merely Fondle"

written by grimbo, 16 May 2011
Rating:

This is number 666 snippet, f**k in hell!

A milestone was achieved by devil-worshipping Spoofer, Jaggedone, he's hit this superb snippet for a 666, see you all in hell!

written by Jaggedone, 16 May 2011
Rating:

Pittsburg Steeler Cuts His Hair

Troy Polamala of the Pittsburg Steelers decides to spend his time during the lockout in the barber shop cutting his hair.

written by Ellie James, 16 May 2011
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US stripper, Chelsea, has boobs heavier than Mrs. Beckham!

A US stripper, Chelsea, has boobs that weigh more then Victoria Beckham in total and after seeing them on the morning TV show Victoria rushed off to the toilet and puked, what an excuse!?

written by Jaggedone, 16 May 2011
Rating:

Nicole Kidman - It's Gotta Be In The Genes

Nicole Kidman is starting to get very concerned about the paleness of her complexion. Several critics have stated that she is starting to look even whiter than Michael Jackson.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 16 May 2011
Rating:

Nothing Like Keeping It In The Family

Tina Fey who has been impersonating Sarah Palin for several years now said that she is branching out. She soon plans to unveil her impersonations of Bristol Palin, Todd Palin, and Piper Palin.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 16 May 2011
Rating:

The Little Fella Can Sure Put The Food Away

Victoria Beckham keeps insisting that she is not anorexic. She adds that her weight loss is due to one hell of a tape worm.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 16 May 2011
Rating:

Poland Will Not Be Fooled

Poland bans double-sided stick tape by saying that it is just simply a bad American joke.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 16 May 2011
Rating:

Todd Palin Lays Down The Law To His "Snowflake"

Todd Palin tired of Sarah wearing the pants in the family tells her to start wearing effen dresses more often or else he's walking out the friggin door.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 16 May 2011
Rating:

Broadway Announces Newest Musical

Seal Team Six: The Musical is set to start in a month. It will star Matthew Broderick as the main Navy Seal, and Nathan Lane as Osama Bin Laden.

written by Ellie James, 16 May 2011
Rating:

French Kiss

A French Kiss by France's Presidential hopeful socialist millionaire Alexandre Loadsamoney has boosted his chances of getting the job.
Burlysconi fears he has a rival who can defeat him.

written by j.w., 16 May 2011
Rating:

"Points Make Prizes"

Energy Sec, Chris Huhne is alleged to have said to his wife that there is a new scheme where you can collect points on your driving licence and win prizes and that he was happy to help by giving her some of his.

written by IN SEINE, 16 May 2011
Rating:

The Cluck Clucking Has Turned More To Cluck Ouching!

An Iowa farmer has developed chickens that can lay square eggs. He said they're great cause the eggs can be stacked in the refrigerator but added that it has traumatized the hell out of his chickens.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 16 May 2011
Rating:

I.M.F. to launch an S.D.R. alternative to the USD

Not Special Drawing Rights, Sexual Deviant Rights!

written by Aspartame Boy, 16 May 2011
Rating:

Snap, Crackle, & Hic!

A man in Flint, Michigan applied for a U.S. patent on his invention which is beer-flavored breakfast cereal. He was not only turned down but fined $2,000.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 16 May 2011
Rating:

But It's Really Just About Safe Football

An on campus group calling itself "Hey Come On" is petitioning the University of Southern California to change its mascot nickname from the condom-sounding name Trojans.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 16 May 2011
Rating:

Well So Much For Those Wonderful Hip Hop Concerts In Yuma

Saying that it was done in a move to cut down on noise pollution, the state of Arizona has passed a bill prohibiting anyone in the state from wearing bling-bling.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 16 May 2011
Rating:

When Two Differing Food Groups Meet It Can Get Ugly

A group of Wisconsin cheeseheads reportedly clashed with a group of Georgia crackerheads and early reports are that the incident was nothing but a crummy, cheesy display of hoodlum like behavior.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 16 May 2011
Rating:

A Happy Meal and A Barbie Doll?

Police arrested a man in Boston in the parking lot of a Mickey D's who was selling nude Barbie Dolls. He pointed out the dolls were not completely naked as each one was wearing stiletto heels.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 16 May 2011
Rating:

Capitol Restaurant Busted

An underground Washington DC restaurant specializing in animals found on the endangered species list (ESL) has been shut down by the Fish and Wildlife Service. The FBI is examining the diner's lists.

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 16 May 2011
Rating:

Mythical Boogie Man

Mommies Against Delusional Democrats (MADD) has sued the US Government and all environmental groups over global warming hysteria. They claim the mythical GW boogie man is scaring their children.

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 16 May 2011
Rating:

Future Ohio Chickens Will Be Happy Little Cluckers

Ohio passed a bill outlawing the branding of chickens. Senators stated that it was really pretty much just a waste of time and besides way too many chickens were catching on fire during the branding.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 16 May 2011
Rating:

A Sarah Palin Rose By Any Other Name

Sarah Palin denies that her political party the Tea Bag Party is a party of haters. She smiles and says, "Ya know, it's really more like a party of dislikers".

written by Abel Rodriguez, 16 May 2011
Rating:

Lindsay Lohan Is Most Definitely One Lucky Ass Bitch

Lindsay Lohan says she's going to write a book on how easy it is to stay out of jail assuming of course one is a rich, Hollywood celebrity who has some kind of magical powers over mere mortal judges.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 16 May 2011
Rating:

Buy Me Some Popcorn and Cracker Jack and Cheap Beer?

Due to the fact it has caused a tremendous amount of fights, the Detroit Tigers organization has decided to stop selling cheap beer at all Tigers games. The more expensive beer will still be sold.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 16 May 2011
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