Order by:
Rating:

45.000 Sidewalk Vendors Go Out of Business!

Mayor Bloomberg blames Democrats:" No one's buying Weiners anymore!"

written by Morse, 08 June 2011
Rating:

24 Hour Takeaway.

A new 24 hour Chinese take away is to be opened in Sunderland.It will be called Wok Around The Clock.

written by Gordon Clarke, 08 June 2011
Rating:

Mass Walk Out At Helium Factory

Spokesman states "we refuse to be spoken to like that"

written by kinderegg7, 08 June 2011
Rating:

U.S. Wine Sales Soar

Sales of wine soar as U.S. mothers prepare for end of school year. A Florida mother stocking up on Cabernet was overheard saying,"How the hell am I suppose to get my nails done with these kids home?"

written by Young American Wisdom, 08 June 2011
Rating:

"You Vell Buy Dis Toy"

The Mattel Toy Company has announced that it will be coming out with a Glenn Beck Bobblehead Doll. The doll will be dressed in a Nazi uniform and will shed tears when you squeeze its swastika.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 08 June 2011
Rating:

Sarah Palin Says That She Needs A Brand New Bus Song

Sarah Palin was asked how her Nationwide Bus Tour is going. She remarked that it is going good but was quick to add that she is tired of that damn friggin "99 Bottles of Beer on The Wall" song.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 08 June 2011
Rating:

Toilet Seats Stolen From Police Headquarters

Detectives are hopeful they will solve the case but have nothing to go on.

written by kinderegg7, 08 June 2011
Rating:

Arnold Schwarzenegger's Book Will Set The Record Straight

Arnold Schwarzenegger will soon be publishing his book titled, "Hey I'm Just An Average Joe With Normal Needs, Urges, and Desires Plus Friggin Raging Male Hormones From Hell."

written by Abel Rodriguez, 08 June 2011
Rating:

The Oscar Mayer People Do Not Want To Get A Bad Name

The Oscar Mayer Corporation has issued a statement that the Oscar Mayer Wienermobile will be parked until all of this Congressman Anthony Weiner mess blows over.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 08 June 2011
Rating:

It's Kind of Like The Political Kiss of Death

When Sarah Palin was informed that GOP mouthpiece Ann Coulter had said that she wants her to be the GOP presidential nominee, Palin reportedly remarked, "Dammit! Shit! Well my ass is doomed now!"

written by Abel Rodriguez, 08 June 2011
Rating:

I Wonder If Heather Locklear Will Vote For Him?

When Rick Santorum announced that he was running in the GOP presidential primary, thousands of voters asked "The guitar player with Bon Jovi?"

written by Abel Rodriguez, 08 June 2011
Rating:

Harold Camping Has Hormonally Spoken Again

Harold Camping has just predicted that Glenn Beck and John Boehner will continue crying over absolutely nothing leading him to believe that they each may have a female ovary.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 08 June 2011
Rating:

Sarah "Snowflake" Palin Has Narrowed Down Her Question Topics

Sarah Palin still embarrassed from her stupid Paul Revere comment has said that she will not answer any questions regarding American history, American sports, or American royalty.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 08 June 2011
Rating:

Unemployed elephants go on rampage in India!

Mysore, India: Elephants have gone on the rampage because they've lost their jobs, logging. They are demanding full pension rights and the same status as the Holy Cow, what a load of "trunk-um"!

written by Jaggedone, 08 June 2011
Rating:

Zippy's funeral to be held this weekend

Zippy from TV show Rainbow died earlier today from suffocation after having his mouth zipped shut for too long. To honour his memory all attendees at his funeral are to wear their flies at half-mast.

written by MonkeyInTheBath, 08 June 2011
Rating:

Door to Door Sex Pest Warning

LADIES - if a man knocks on your door and asks you to take your shirt off don't - it's a scam. He just wants to see your tits!

written by kinderegg7, 08 June 2011
Rating:

Daring Raid On London Zoo.

In a daring raid on London Zoo,the Irish SAS have released all of the ostriches and shot four gorillas.

written by Gordon Clarke, 08 June 2011
Rating:

Ice cream meltdown feared in drought

Official figures revealing the extent of the ice cream meltdown have underestimated the catastrophe. The drought has almost exhausted supplies in four areas of Britain.

written by j.w., 08 June 2011
Rating:

Psychic launches Mass Grave hunt

A Psychic from West Ham has led the Police to digging up the Chelsea football pitch as a mass grave was 'sensed' underneath it. 'Only escargots found so far' a Police source revealed today.

written by j.w., 08 June 2011
Rating:

Ah Those Crazy North Korean Missile Launchers

Well the North Koreans are at it again. They tested a short range missile and this one reportedly went off target and hit a McDonald's in downtown Seoul completely wiping out the drive thru window.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 08 June 2011
Rating:

The Nation's "First Kiddoes" Malia and Sasha Are Not Happy Campers

Malia and Sasha Obama are not happy about taking that trip to Africa. The girls told their mom that if they want to see zebras and flamingos they can go to the Tarzan and Jane Petting Zoo in Tarzana.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 08 June 2011
Rating:

Sarah Palin Gains Yet Another Bit of Confidence

Herman Cain just said that he is throwing his hat into the GOP presidential primary. Sarah Palin smiled and replied, "Oh good, ya know, I'm pretty darn sure that I can kick his unknown ass."

written by Abel Rodriguez, 08 June 2011
Rating:

Arnie Loves Anthony

Arnold Schwarzenegger is so happy that Congressman Anthony Weiner has taken the focus off of his wiener with his wiener that he sent him a check for $600 and six DVDs of his movies.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 08 June 2011
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