Peter Papper Papped a pair of 'pappers' according to CKCO news
Peter Papper, otherwise known is Petet Piper picking pickled peppers, recently Papped a pair of Pappers taking pictures of Spoof Writers. Super injuctions expected to follow.
CHCH t.v . Ontario reports on pappings
CHCH t.v. Ontario is concerned about the number of residents on Southern Ontario being 'papped' without their concent. Many are taking such 'pappings' to court.
As reported on CNN Pope Papped
As reported on CNN tonight, the Pope was well and truly papped. Yes 'Pontif Papped'.
Arizona Will Still Be Arizona
The Pentagon has stated that the rumors about plans to nuke Arizona are absolutely false.
Some of Them Old Folks Could Stop A Grandfather Clock
Authorities in Florida report that they have had to close down a nude beach that catered to the elderly due to reports that they were scaring away the seagulls, the minnows, and the sharks.
The Taliban Gave It It's Best Shot (No Pun Intended)
Reports that the Taliban applied for membership in the Tripoli Better Business Bureau have been confirmed as being factual. The BBB did say that they were turned down on grounds of belligerency.
The Channel Formerly Known As C-SPAN
C-SPAN plans to change it's name to C-SPAM in order to attract more Internet surfers.
Valentine's Day Heist
Several stores reported that there was an increase in stolen condoms the week before Valentine's Day. One store owner commented, "Nothing says I love you like having sex with a stolen condom."
Fight at Barnes and Nobles
After several fights broke out at Barnes and Nobles, management had this to say; "In retrospect, it wasn't a good idea to put the philosophy books across from the Bibles."
New Black Friday!
Black Friday is always a big shopping day, and Cyber Monday proved to be popular with consumers as well. Companies prepare for the newest addition this year, Telemarketing Tuesday!
Boss of FIFA eradicates all corruption!
The FIFA is riddled with corruption and Sepp Blatter is determined to make FIFA clean. "World Cup bids will only be accepted by those countries who pay me the most, that's it!"
US Bans Texting While Planking
And while you're at it, get that cell phone away from your head. It will fry your brain.
In a shock development FIFA President Sepp Blatter has been ousted from front pages by a virulent cucumber.
written by j.w.
, 01 June 2011
Elvis seen in Parliament claim debunked - 'A misprint!'
We can confirm that Elvis has not been seen in the Houses of Commons at all - this was a misprint, it should have read "Elves seen in Parliament!"
June Question Time in Common's Delayed!
Common's Question Time has had to be delayed, while Members, Police, Labour Party Members, Air Sea Rescue, and Alcoholics Anonymous carry out a search for Ed Miliband.
The clueless Republican Party chiefs need to get their presidential candidate act together. Otherwise, the US will get four more years of the current clueless Commander in Chief!
Rabid environmentalists will whine at President Obama to terminate US nuclear power plant construction based on Germany's decision. That would make oil, coal and nuclear power these nuts have ruined!
Three Cheers for Texas
Proposed Texas legislation would prohibit a TSA screener from touching the anus, sexual organ, buttocks or breasts of a traveler during a pat down.
Useless UN/WHO Study
Cell phones "possibly cause cancer" according to a WHO study, the same as certain vegetables and coffee. The danger of cell phone use appears to be car accidents and people walking into poles.
Famous lady's and men's underwear manufacturer is giving away a free environmentalist with each purchase. Why not, rabid environmentalists are in every Americans pants anyway!
A Planet of their Own
A potential 2012 presidential candidate has promised (if elected) that US rabid environmentalists would be given the planet Venus, provided they all settle there!