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Ramsay Not Happy With Face-Lift

Gordon Ramsay observing face-job in mirror told plastic surgeon Gordon Peel: "For fucksake man, it's waaaaay overcooked! I'd never serve that in my restaurant!"

written by Auntie Matter, 03 January 2011
Rating:

Love and Death threats for Justin and Selena

Selena Gomez denies taking Justin Bieber's virginity on their St Lucia love holiday. Says the pics just showed her teaching him how to shave and the other was her praying and not doing cough and drop.

written by Big Bunny News, 03 January 2011
Rating:

Giant Cat Hunted!

A giant cat was being hunted today, after it ate the entire contents of Billingsgate fish market. Stall holders and traders said the whole plaice has disappeared.

written by armfeetandtoe, 03 January 2011
Rating:

Regis Philbin Has Cleared Up The Lesbian Rumors

Regis Philbin wants everyone to know that the rumors going around that The Statue of Liberty is a lesbian are not true. Philbin angrily stated, "People, it's a friggin statue for goodness sakes!"

written by Abel Rodriguez, 03 January 2011
Rating:

The Thing That Only Shakira The Belly Shaker Can Do!

Shakira has admitted that two weeks ago she was shaking her hips so fast that she looked down and noticed that her belly button had ended up on her back.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 03 January 2011
Rating:

Can Glenn "Baby Teardrops" Beck Really Be Believed

Glenn Beck has stated that for his new year's resolution he promises to try and not cry like a little girl so much.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 03 January 2011
Rating:

Finally - The Real Reason Why The Dixie Chicks Really Broke Up

The Dixie Chicks finally admitted that the reason they broke up was because the bands last CD only sold a total of eight copies.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 03 January 2011
Rating:

Thank You Yogi Berra For Clearing It All Up

Baseball legend Yogi Berra wants everyone to know that he really did not say a lot of the things that people said that he really did not say he said.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 03 January 2011
Rating:

Home Alone 3 with Macaulay Culkin

30 year old Culkin's girlfriend Mila Kunis dumped him for a 10 year old at the Plaza

written by JAB, 03 January 2011
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Heather Mills tweets Zsa Zsa

Ever the performer Mills tweeted, "Break a leg, Zsa Zsa."

written by JAB, 03 January 2011
Rating:

Zsa Zsa Gabor no longer being considered for DWTS

A producer for Dancing with the Stars said they were considering the 93 year old but reconsidered in light of her possibly missing too many shows.

written by JAB, 03 January 2011
Rating:

Free wings in Arkansas

"We's got over a 1000 free wings, all's you all gotta do is brung the suds," said Rufus Leaking from Buttole, just outside of Bubba's home in Hope.

written by JAB, 03 January 2011
Rating:

Like A Bridge Over Tainted Waters

Pennsylvania allows dumping of tainted waters from gas boom. "Tainted awful?", asked local resident.

written by Bureau, 03 January 2011
Rating:

With A Capital T

Troubled Jerry Brown says that he is just the person to lead a troubled California.

written by Bureau, 03 January 2011
Rating:

Cleaner Tractors?

Cleaner tractors get cool reception from farmers. "We're hauling cow shit all day", says interviewee.

written by Bureau, 03 January 2011
Rating:

You Won't Be Back!

Schwarzenegger leaves public office with 22% approval, his highest since coming into office.

written by Bureau, 03 January 2011
Rating:

Obama Corrupt!

Issa: Obama administration 'one of most corrupt in modern times'. 'Worst since the Bush administration.'

written by Bureau, 03 January 2011
Rating:

Giant rat eats takeaway!!

A giant rat was being hunted today after eating an entire Chinese takeaway. The Wank Wang Hoe takeaway was last seen poking out the side of the rodents mouth.

written by armfeetandtoe, 03 January 2011
Rating:

Believe It Or Don't

Illinois twins born in different years. Tortosa in 2009 and Reposa in 2011!

written by Bureau, 03 January 2011
Rating:

Obama Family Will Be OK

Republicans may starve financial reform of cash. It's a good thing that the Obamas put up all that produce from Michelle's garden.

written by Bureau, 03 January 2011
Rating:

NFL Is A Spoof

If you think the college football rankings are bad, check the TB Bucs 10-6 record & not reaching the NFL Playoffs while the Seattle team, at 7-9 does. Head to head TB beat Seattle 38-15 during season.

written by Bureau, 03 January 2011
Rating:

Geek To Geek?

Texas man tries Geek To Geek site for a partner and winds up with a Dork.

written by Bureau, 03 January 2011
Rating:

Cosmopolitan Hits Milestone

Cosmopolitan Magazine publishes its 10,000th way you can please your man.

written by Bureau, 03 January 2011
Rating:

Ricky Ponting Chased out of Australia due to Weather

Cricket captain Ricky Ponting is said to have had to flee Australia following press claims that he was responsible for the flooding in the country as well as the dismal performance in the Ashes.

written by Collins_and_Dutton, 03 January 2011
Rating:

Obama Studying Reagan

Obama Studies Reagan Years for Guidance on Pushing Agenda: #1 "Begin all replies to unhappy reporters with, "Well, there you go again."

written by Bureau, 03 January 2011
Rating:

NKorea Talking Tough

North Korea talks tough but opens door to diplomacy after Kim switches from cartoons to old Bogart movies.

written by Bureau, 03 January 2011
Rating:

US porn industry joins the navy!

The UYS navy is becoming a regular supplier of fresh porn to the industry back in LA, so Ron Jeremy offered his services and was "piped" on board!

written by Jaggedone, 03 January 2011
Rating:

BBC Scandal

The BBC used fake snow to create winter news headlines!
Several rusty snow machines found scattered all over the country.

written by armfeetandtoe, 03 January 2011
Rating:

Unemployed Scroungers to get help soon!

London's pathetic unemployed scroungers to be assisted!

The Council for Civil Liberties will visit and investigate them at the House of Lords this week!

written by Inchcock, 03 January 2011
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