Microsoft release car
Microsoft have moved into the automobile industry with the release of their first car. The car comes with Windows but critics say that it is prone to crashing.
Higgs Boson Disappears
Scientists were today disappointed in their hunt for the "God particle" because it had disappeared from their very eyes. However, they may have found the "Gaddafi particle" which may disappear soon.
Newest Dummies book is Hugely Popular in Libya
IDG books states they are pleased that their recently published How to Run a Country For Dummies is flying off the shelves in Libya.
Werewolf dressed as a Scouser bites man's face off!
A Liverpool man turned into a werewolf outside a very dubious nightclub and bit his victim's nose, ears and lips off. He or it was last seen running off yowling even though it was no full moon!
Once The DNA Results Come In They'll Have Their Man
New York City detectives have announced that David Letterman's death threat was written on NBC stationary. Jay Leno reportedly said, "Hey, NBC has lots and lots of shows okay, so stop hounding ME!"
Now, That's A Darn Good Reason
The Chinese and American basketball brawl apparently started when one of the Chinese players told one of the U.S. players that he looked like Whoopi Goldberg.
There Was Just No Way To Tune Them Out
A Mormon male went to an emergency room in Salt Lake City with an ear injury. When the doctor asked what happened he replied that he has six wives and they finally managed to talk his ear off.
George Lopez Does Not Waste Any Time
George Lopez, whose TBS talk show just got cancelled, called the executives at CBS and told them that he is available just in case David Letterman decides to go into The Witness Protection Program.
I was complaining about rushed justice the other day but couldn't finish my sentence.
written by j.w.
, 24 August 2011
Gaddaffi to resign
Colonel Gaddaffi will resign the Libyan Presidency at noon tomorrow as long as his demands for a luxury cruise liner to accommodate his extensive harem of Romanian milkmaids are met. Mmmmm, lucky man.
Gaddaffi and his sweet tooth
Colonel Gaddaffi has agreed to step down as Libya's President providing his demands for unlimited amounts of chocolate bars are met. He even asked for supplies of chewing gum. Where does he get off?
Gaddaffi to relinquish office
Colonel Gaddaffi will resign the Libyan Presidency at noon tomorrow just as soon as his demand for 400 skanky hoes is met. Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian have put their hands up to be part of this.
Pres. Obama announced regulatory reforms, eliminating red tape & saving taxpayers' $4B, but the reforms don't actually eliminate regulations. An earthquake of magnitude 5.9 then hit Washington DC!
Hell Hath No Fury
The Tea Party says Rep. Maxine Waters (D-CA) can go straight to Hell. Oops she already represents that Los Angeles CA district in the US House!