Order by:
Rating:

Terrorist Attack Warning

Another terrorist attack warning announced today in London by official who then ran screaming out the studio door.

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Maybe These Are The Duds

Several unmanned military drones recalled due to delayed explosion on impact. However, everyone scatters as three had already been launched and headed back.

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

No Vision In DC

Even after the announcement of much more water being on the moon than first thought plus many minerals, President Obama still cancels moon program.

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Careful Now!

There is going to be a new movie out called 'careful now' based on Fr.Dougal McGuires Life, a must see movie very interesting with a guest appearence of pope benedict. Go see it

written by Ellen, 21 October 2010
Rating:

No To Future NPR Funding

In wake of Williams firing, Republicans want NPR funding examined. "Why should conservatives pay for liberal network?"

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Way Back When!

Swiss archaeologists find 5,000-year-old door, Ray Manzarek. Played keyboards on "Light My Fire!"

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Obama Scrutiny To Increase

GOP lawmaker looks to increase scrutiny of Obama. Place him where he HAS to answer questions he's refused to talk about!

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

NPR Fires Williams

Leftist NPR fires Juan Williams for Muslim remarks on Fox. They actually didn't even WANT him of Fox. "Even Obama afraid of going on there."

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

No Panic On A Submarine

Navy picks submarines that will carry first women with special PMS quarters.

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Some Still In Bed

Wives of trapped miners say they went from the worst of times to the times of wurst!

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Pot Not Cure-All

Legal pot could save millions, but not a cure-all. More like 'Feeling A Lot Better-All".

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Bionic arm causes crash in Austria!

A bionic arm and it's owner had a terrible crash in Austria today, the arm wanted to go to ze left, the owner to ze right, what a pair of one-arm-bandit-crash-dummies!

written by Jaggedone, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Didn't Shake Her Booty

Girl, 11, kicked out of cheerleading team for 'not shaking her booty enough', not pushing out training bra.

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Montgomerie In Car Crash

Golf star Colin Montgomerie left 'shaken' after car crash. "I was all teed....keyed up", he tells reporters.

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

"It's Like He's Rediscovered He Has One!"

Why women get more miserable with age (and men cheer up) It has a lot to do with men finally retiring, having plenty of time and lots of Viagra available.

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

False Accuser To Prison

Rape-lie woman, 21, who falsely accused man of sex attack is told by judge: 'You're going to prison..where the rapes might be real!'

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Those Were Helium Balloons In Sky Over NYC!

After the UFO spotting over New York recently being explained to be helium balloons, the West Coast Post called the aliens directly and they say that's most likely what it was. "We were on Titan."

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

New Number Two

Al-Qaida #3 moved up to #2 on the after this past weekend of fighting, according to the BCS standings!

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

The 1989 Axe Murder

Police in New York City admit that their cops there did a hatchet job on that axe murder business there in 1989.

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Good At Economics, Alright

One of two winners of the Nobel Prize for Economics auctions it off on e-Bay, uses money to invest in gold!

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Pelosi Fires One Back!

Speaker of the House, Nancy Pelosi fires back at critics, catches back of dress, curtains behind her on fire!

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Fed Judge To Hand Down Ruling

Federal Judge to rule on "Don't Ask, Don't Tell, Don't Scratch, Don't Smell" question.

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Buggers Out On Strike!

Employees at Hilton Hotel in Chicago go on three-day bedbug strike!

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

"Look, They Are Huge!"

Inside Source says that huge heads on Mount Rushmore has saved the Earth from invading UFO's many, many times.

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Egg Farm Closed Temporarily

FDA finds old eggs, dead rats, 2 missing employees beneath chickenshit at Egg Farm!

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Troops Saying Same Thing!

President Obama to visit Pakistan in 2011 instead of next month - "Little too much bombing lately for my tastes", says President.

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

City Leaders Steal From Housing For Poor

Money meant for affordable housing in Bell, CA, instead used by city's leaders as 'self-indulgent slush fund'. Claim they need plenty of lushes in hot weather.

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Just Like The Cowboy's Boots

Penthouse magazine founder Bob Guccione dies with his condom on in a suburban Dallas hospital at age 79

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Lady Gaga Cancels Paris Performance

French protests update: Lady Gaga cancels Paris concerts due to 'logistical difficulties' surrounding strikes. Now they're really mad!

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

UConn Bomb Threat

Update on UConn bomb threat: West Hartford campus has been evacuated as have several student's bowels.

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Merkel In Men's Dressing Room

Merkel calms storm over dressing-room visit. "Just checking on the sizes so I can boast!"

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Like Hitler, Mussolini!

Iran, Venezuela leaders seek 'new world order' with themselves as co-leaders!

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Penthouse Founder Dies

PENTHOUSE founder Guccione dies, aged 79. Ashes to be spread in centerfold!

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

War In NYC!

'Stink bugs' hit New York. Battle NYC bed bugs for territory!

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Inventing Internet

White House takes credit for George Bush-era wind farm jobs. Eisenhower leadership in WWII.

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Clinton Lost Nuclear Codes

BOOK: Clinton Lost Nuclear Codes While in Office but Monica Lewinsky found them under his desk.

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Frying Bacon Smell Offends Muslims

UK cafe owner ordered to remove fan because neighbor claims 'smell of frying bacon offends Muslims'...Owner says loud Muslim prayers is noise pollution.

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

NPR: National Politically-Correct Reports

Huckabee calls on Congress to cut NPR funding. "They prefer Iran and Venezuela to the US.

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Obama Incoherent

Rove: Obama's Incoherent Closing Argument...Sounded more like Bush than Bush!

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Whatever It Takes?

Dem promises move into mobile home if elected Texas gov! Trade his Corvette for pick-up truck!

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Hitler A Tourist Attraction

Hitler becomes major Berlin tourist attraction. Most common comment? "I thought he was dead!"

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

What's Detrimental?

Colts' McAfee suspended one game for "detrimental" conduct. McAfee claims he was only drunk, not a mental case.

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Obamja Seeking Bipartisanship

Jarrett: Obama still interested in bipartisanship. Former President George W. Bush: That big prevert!

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Women More Charitabile

Study: Women give more to charity than men. Number one reason according to male interviews: "They have all our money."

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Retained Fireman Burns Down Office Block

He turned a small waste bin fire into a roaring blaze, saying "I fought fire with fire, but it didn't work!"

written by Nick Hobbs, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Women's Rights Worsen

The U.S.-led invasion and then occupation of Iraq brought a sharp setback to the rights of women in that country, according to late night comedians.

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Obama Courting Women #2

Obama courts women voters on West Coast tour...except for San Francisco area! Not that there's anything wrong with that.

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Obama Courting Women

Obama courts women voters on West Coast tour! Bill Clinton: You can do that?

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Teacher Recognized!

Local teacher recognized as students up to 20 years ago say, "Yep, that's her alright."

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

It All Evens Up!

Study: Women give more to charity than men but men donate much more racetracks, casinos.

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Winter Forecasts Out!

Winter: Warm and dry South, cold and wet Northwest. Southwest and Northeast: Middlin'

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Student TakesTown Police

Mexican student takes over police in drug war town as he's the oldest person still alive.

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Afghan Peace Council!

Afghan peace council wants Saudi Arabia's help, money.

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

World's Longest Opossum!

World's longest opossum, Flathead - measures 14 feet! Apparently ran over by a highway roller!

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

You're The Democrat, Right? ...Nope?

Gillibrand, DioGuardi set for 2nd NY Senate debate as they will try once again to help voters know which is which!

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Drinking Ripple?

US-Saudi arms deal causes ripple from Iran to Israel, fine wine in others.

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Public Radio Fires Commentary

US public radio fires analyst over Muslim comments saying that Muslim nations that supported the terrorists, although most agree with him.

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Oldest Galaxy So Far

Astronomers say they've found oldest galaxy so far. Name it the Larry King Galaxy!

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Might As Well Get It Over with!

Toyota recalling 1.53 million cars globally! Update: Toyota says to just bring all their cars back to dealers to go over from one end to the other!

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Obama's Closing Argument

Obama's closing, familiar argument: Time to choose! It's either the devil you know or the devil you don't know!

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Dirtry Politics #4

United States political really dirty this year: I happen to know that my opponent is backed by the Mexican Drug Cartel!

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Dirty Politics #3

United States political really dirty this year: My unworthy opponent burned a Koran AND The Book o Mormon!

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Dirty Politics #2

United States political really dirty this year: I happen to know that my opponent hates every sing one of those Twilight movie actors!

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Dirty Politics

United States political really dirty this year: I happen to know that my opponent caused that mine in Chile to collapse!"

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Parallel Universe Breakthrough

CERN scientists eye parallel universe breakthrough. Could be Coincidence but scientists there say they have just discovered us!

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Almost Bagged LBJ!

Ex-Secret Service officer: I almost shot LBJ. I could have been famous...infamous!

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Oldest Galaxy Yet

Astronomers say they've found oldest galaxy so far. Possible humans there are 10,000 years old!

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Long Tall Cat

World's longest cat - Stewie - measures 4 feet. Several callers say their cats have four feet also!

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

French Protests Continue

Clashes, protests in French tensions over pensions! Flares over cares! Gobs over jobs!

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Toyota Recall!

Toyota recalling 1.53 million cars globally! Recalls begin to catch up with production.

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Obama's Closing Argument #5

Obama's closing, familiar argument: "Time to choose. It's either me or the deep blue sea!"

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Obama's Closing Argument #4

Obama's closing, familiar argument: Time to choose! Neither one of us know what we're doing, but we have had more practice!

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Obama's Final Argument: #3

Obama's closing, familiar argument: Time to choose! With us, it's only a hard place. With the GOP, it's a rock!

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Obama's Argument #2

Obama's closing, familiar argument: Time to choose: Either you stay with us and go bankrupt or go to them and go bankrupt!

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

So Farewell, Bob Guccione

I used to read one of your magazines, Omni, for the sci-fi.

written by Ellis Ian Fields, 21 October 2010
Rating:

The Key Question

Obama's closing, familiar argument: Time to choose: Do you want to stick with this mess or not?

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Don't Need To Be Whoppers!

Major doctors study say that there is absolutely nothing harmful about silicone implants but caution women from putting too much in their boobs no matter how the husbands pleads!

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Goverment Borrowing At Record High

Neighbour demanding return of lawnmower and barbecue. And where's my West Wing DVD set?

written by Ellis Ian Fields, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Government to tighten the belt

British Government has announced spending cutbacks to balance the economy. They will also introduce rationing and ask poor people to live in the subway tunnels for their own good. Sackcloth please!!

written by whatinthe world, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Prince barred by HQ

News in that HRH Prince Charles has been banned by Buckingham Palace from speech making because people can't stand his rambling discourse on uninteresting subjects. The Prince will continue to smile.

written by whatinthe world, 21 October 2010
Rating:

And get that cock out of your mouth, soldier!

California federal appeals court grants temporary stay Wednesday, puts "don't ask, don't tell" policy back into effect for U.S. military. Gays recruited since Oct. 12 ordered back into the closet.

written by The San Francisco Onion, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Sarah Palin Comes to Defense of Christine O' Donnel

Sarah Palin defended Christine O' Donnel's gaf about the first ammendment today, saying she is often confused about that "Constitution stuff too". She wants Christine to be her running mate in 2012.

written by Jean Le Fete, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Truth is Stranger than Fiction

A man leaning out of a moving car window was killed when the vehicle swiped a telephone pole. The dog driving the car was cited for speeding!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Good News and Bad News

Good news, the Mayan "Long Count" calendar may not end on Dec. 21, 2012. Bad news, the Sun will burn out in 5 billion years. Scientists advise putting the latter date in your Blackberry!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 21 October 2010
Rating:

To Defend the US Constitution

The command "to the rear march" sounds like a funny line about a gay person serving in the US military. Dying in combat serving in the US military transcends being gay or straight, subject to UCMJ!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Identity Crisis

President Obama has a problem identifying USA enemies from friends. Iran representatives were invited to attend a NATO conference on Afghanistan. Apparently, Osama bin Laden and Mullah Omar were busy!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Political Sex

Democratic liberal left sex partners achieve orgasm by one yelling "tax" and the other screaming "spend!"

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Phony Altruism

Have you noticed that the very wealthy Democratic liberal left elitists have not given the federal government back the money they saved from President Bush's 2010 estate tax and 10 year tax cuts?

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Budget Balancing is not Taught at Harvard Law School

HS Pelosi & SML Reid didn't vote on the Bush tax cuts before the recess. These arrogant elitists plan to get the next $3.6 trillion from the taxpayers for Pres. Obama's frivolous spending policies.

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 21 October 2010
Rating:

You're Not Going to Believe This

After two years of dealing with problems in the Oval Office a president's hair usually turns white. President Obama's hair is still the same color, but……………………….!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Leveled Playing Field

Republicans are searching for a 2012 presidential candidate who has no executive experience, no economic expertise and no foreign relations savvy. A perfect match to run against President Obama!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Obamanomics to be Outlawed

The new 112th Congress is to propose a 28th amendment to the US Constitution, calling for "the separation of the USA economy and state!"

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Liberals Worst Nightmare

Republicans win the US House & US Senate in 2010. President Obama resigns in 2012, but VP Biden is too stunned to become president. House Speaker John Boehner sworn in as the 45th US president.

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Republican Confidence Grows

President Obama, VP Biden and former President Clinton are stumping for Democrats, two weeks before the elections. A Democratic empty suit, an empty head and an overinflated ego are on your side!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 21 October 2010
Rating:

800 Billion Reasons to Remove the Speaker

The three Republican's in Nancy Pelosi's San Francisco CA US House District believe it is the Democratic moderates who will unseat the house speaker, either at home or in Washington DC!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Just when You Thought it was Safe I

Following the mid-term elections there will be a Lame duck session of Congress. Get ready for more Democratic liberal left proposed inane federal legislation!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Just when You Thought it was Safe II

In January 2011 surviving blue state legislatures will be convened. State houses infested by Democratic liberal left lobbyists will push inane legislation continuing to tax/spend & over regulate!


written by Philbert of Macadamia, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Gubernatorial Hopefuls Target Women Voters

The red and blue candidates vying in a state governorship race are courting a key voting constituency, namely women. The candidate's jealous (green) wives have been conspicuously absent.


written by Philbert of Macadamia, 21 October 2010
Rating:

They Also Believe in the Tooth Fairy I

Environmentalists believe that by reducing energy consumption by 1% per year due to leaky windows and adding home insulation, no new electrical generation facilities will ever be needed in the USA!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 21 October 2010
Rating:

They Also Believe in the Tooth Fairy II

Some environmentalists, who never took thermodynamics courses, believe that gasoline consumption (hence foreign oil) can be reduced by operating automobiles at 25 miles per hour!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Not Enough Problems to Solve?

Democratic liberal left think tanks keep creating insignificant problems to solve, as they have no real solutions to the USA's current economic, immigration and foreign relations problems!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 21 October 2010
Rating:

HHS Solves Obesity Problem

HHS mandates home bathroom scales be wired to an HHS overweight control center via the internet. When getting on the scale in the morning, big brother may say "get your fat ass to the health club!"

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Nuts to be Regulated

After 40 years of research the FDA identifies how many peanuts it takes to make a jar of peanut butter. No release of information is planned until FDA's 2011 Congressional appropriation is approved.

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 21 October 2010
Rating:

New Mile High Club!

Although most people in the western world have heard of the "Mile High Club", the "Mile High Mooning Club" has just come to light.

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Regulation is Needed

A study determined that small children playing with their own waste products can be hazardous. Parents have been plagued with this problem for millennia, but the EPA now plans to ban the practice.

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 21 October 2010
Rating:

Popular Uprising

Popular uprising in France continues into third weekend, now partially blamed on Levitra 48-Hours!

written by Bureau, 21 October 2010
« Sep 2010 October 2010 Nov 2010 »
Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat Sun
 
1st
26
2nd
28
3rd
25
4th
16
5th
33
6th
70
7th
71
8th
79
9th
70
10th
67
11th
80
12th
98
13th
106
14th
98
15th
103
16th
77
17th
99
18th
86
19th
90
20th
102
21st
106
22nd
88
23rd
98
24th
124
25th
95
26th
87
27th
90
28th
92
29th
91
30th
95
31st
107

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 3 plus 3?

8 4 6 25


61 readers are online right now!

Go to top