Order by:
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Taliban Leader Killed By UN Forces

Top Taliban leader killed in northern Afghanistan. That's the 2,011th one so far.

written by Bureau, 02 October 2010
Rating:

A Successful Crossing!

Scientists at an Alabama University have successfully crossed a banjo with a chicken and have come up with a bird that plucks itself.

written by IN SEINE, 02 October 2010
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Chasing Their Tails Again

FBI Targets Peace Activists For Terrorism Support! Also Raid Terrorist Camps Looking For Peace Activists!

written by Bureau, 02 October 2010
Rating:

Come On Back Home!

Band of America suspends foreclosures in 23 states. "We can't sell them either."

written by Bureau, 02 October 2010
Rating:

Costs Run Over A Bit

President Obama's $814 billion economic stimulus plan is meeting its targets for spending & job creation, at $2 million per job, White House officials say, however unpopular it may be with the public.

written by Bureau, 02 October 2010
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Don't Have To Be Terrorists

US considers warning Americans in Europe to stay away from public places like soccer matches due to terror, ass-kicking threats.

written by Bureau, 02 October 2010
Rating:

Strikers At The Table

Striking South African workers are returning to the negotiating table. "All that striking has built me up an appetite", says foreman.

written by Bureau, 02 October 2010
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Maliki Gets Nod From Shiite

Maliki gets Shiite nod to head new Iraqi government. "Like everyone else, we have some Good Shiite and some Bad Shiite."

written by Bureau, 02 October 2010
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Sang "Hello Dolly"

Congo opposition figure allegedly escapes kidnapping attempt by disguising himself as the late Louie Armstrong.

written by Bureau, 02 October 2010
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Only 30 More Days

Dems, GOP recalibrate strategy a month to election by visiting local cemeteries, copying down voter's names.

written by Bureau, 02 October 2010
Rating:

New TV Poll!

In a new poll from the southern United States, 82% of the people still think that Winfrey's first name is Okra!

written by Bureau, 02 October 2010
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US Consumer Spending Up 4 per cent.

Set to fall again after Ellis Ian and Mrs Fields returned to UK last week after stateside holiday.

written by Ellis Ian Fields, 02 October 2010
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New EC Austerity Measures - 3

Ireland reacts to EC tax rate criticism: "No fair! Why are you always picking on me? Belgium did it too!"

written by Ellis Ian Fields, 02 October 2010
Rating:

Daily Express Publisher's Profits Down 78 Per Cent.

"We've been losing too many readers. It's the Express readers' exploding head syndrome, I guess," said a group spokesman.

written by Ellis Ian Fields, 02 October 2010
Rating:

Apparently Not Scared Shitless

Most US and Europe concerned this morning as the latest terrorist's threats have upped the warning systems to "Brown!"

written by Bureau, 02 October 2010
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Thinking Outside the Box

US Defense Department interested in renting Chilean mine for prison to replace Gitmo. Prisoners placed half a mile down will be closer to their 72 virgins.

written by Nailer, 02 October 2010
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Bin Laden Showing Off A Bit

In 2nd tape, bin Laden urges Pakistan flood relief and told everyone to notice that he is now appearing in 3D.

written by Bureau, 02 October 2010
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Bin Laden Tape Two

In 2nd tape, bin Laden urges Pakistan flood relief. Also, that former CEO of BP Oil come and pick up his check.

written by Bureau, 02 October 2010
Rating:

Bin Laden Take Two

In 2nd tape, bin Laden urges Pakistan flood relief. Also, that Miley Cyrus come and dance in front of him.

written by Bureau, 02 October 2010
Rating:

The Men Love Him!

In 2nd tape, bin Laden urges Pakistan flood relief, requests a copy of the latest from Justin Bieber.

written by Bureau, 02 October 2010
Rating:

"Alleged" Even Miss The Virgins

Two suspected American missile strikes killed 12 alleged militants in a northwestern Pakistan tribal region Saturday. "They're the worse ones, those alleged militants", stated one officer.

written by Bureau, 02 October 2010
Rating:

Pot Vote Increasing Numbers?

Marijuana initiatives could bring young Democrats to the polls or it could lead them to try voting in bathroom stalls.

written by Bureau, 02 October 2010
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Clinton Volunteers

Former president Bill Clinton volunteers to head up the new Democrat "Stimulus Bill!"

written by Bureau, 02 October 2010
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W.H. Defends Stimulus Bill

White House defends economic stimulus plan. "If it takes $2 Million to create a good job, we'll get it back in taxes over the next 25 years!"

written by Bureau, 02 October 2010
Rating:

California Decriminalizes Pot

SCHWARZENEGGER DECRIMINALIZES MARIJUANA POSSESSION IN CA.! "Just as long as we don't catch you smoking it. Provide yourself a pot den."

written by Bureau, 02 October 2010
Rating:

Latino Host Fired

LATINO HOST FIRED FROM CNN, CALLS JON STEWART 'BIGOT'! But then cannot explain what a 'bigot' is. "He has big belly!"

written by Bureau, 02 October 2010
Rating:

Avatar To Now Be Released in 1 Dimension

James Cameron set to Re-re-release Avatar in 1 Dimension.
Click here for full story.

written by ronin47empire, 02 October 2010
Rating:

I Was At Vatican

US judge asks Vatican to serve court paper to Pope after popemobile spotted doing 85MPH in 10 MPH Zone.

written by Bureau, 02 October 2010
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