Order by:
Rating:

King: I Work Out With One Hour Pencil Lifts Religiously!

Betty White: I'm already getting lonesome as I've outlived so many of my friends and I'm not quite 90 yet. How does Larry King do it?

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Celtic Look To Gay Kirk!

In a bid to become Scottish football champions SFC Celtic have appointed the Reverend Scott Rennie as their number two coach in the hope he can motivate the majority of gay Catholics at the club!

written by iscrivener, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Give Or Take A "0"

DEBT RISE TO $19,600,000,000,000.00 BY 2015! However, we will probably be under oily water by then so don't take it too hard.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Fecal Study 95% Accurate

Fecal analysis shows that film maker Michael Moore is eating too much.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

UK World Bank Bail Out Agreement

PM David Cameron has negotiated a billion pound bailout plan for the UK debt deficit and has lead by example by including all UK citizens in his calculations but not including former PM Gordon Brown

written by iscrivener, 08 June 2010
Rating:

UK Pensions Non Payout Scandal

NHS staff are under strict instructions from HM Government not to disclose serious illnesses to patients under 60 in the hope they will die before retirement age so as to save on state pension payouts

written by iscrivener, 08 June 2010
Rating:

US Soccer Hyperactive Scandal

US Soccer coach Bob Bradley faces further questioning by FIFA about allegations that the whole US soccer squad have been prescribed mega doses of legalised thyroxin prior to the 2010 World Cup!

written by iscrivener, 08 June 2010
Rating:

One legged chicken costs insane owner GBP 1800, pull the other one!

A Welsh chicken owner has claimed bankruptcy after saving it from the oven, the vet saved one leg and pulled the other, "it tasted nice," he said

written by Jaggedone, 08 June 2010
Rating:

400 Pot Shops Closed

Los Angeles forces more than 400 pot clinics to close. Other 3,000 "Right On!" for now.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Barney Frank & Aide Caught With Pants Down!

Frank said he was only responding to crictics who said he couldn't find his ass with both hands. Unfortunately, they meant HIS hands!

written by Morse, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Congress Responsible for New Oxymoran!

ETHICS COMMITTEE.

written by Morse, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Flash! Whites Now Minority in US after Current Census!

Workers say they were afraid to go into Palm Beach, Fl. Greenwich, Conn, Beverly Hills, CA, or Lubeck,Me and count people that didn't look like them or speak their language. Obama claims victory!

written by Morse, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Chinese Scientists Limited To One Artificial Life-Form Per Scientist Rule

With 1.3 billion humans and 50 trillion micro-organisms, more micro-organisms are simply not part of the plan.There will be exceptions for scientists who create a female bacterium - source mindry.in

written by ronin47empire, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Tiger Woods Says Global Warming a Hoax!

Responds after exam shows he's cooled off since his testosterone levels
have dropped to match his sponsors, his bank account, and number of Friends on Facebook.

written by Morse, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Tipper Gore Demands Wax Impression of Al's Penis in Settlement!

Attorney said she intends to light it every night and pray thanks to God her 40 year ordeal is finally over!

written by Morse, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Special Announcement

We interrupt this special broadcast that another oil well is leaking and that atomic blast in Iran when someone tripped over a bomb...It was the CHICKEN that came first.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

American Replys to McCartney Smear of Bush!

Anyone taken over the coals by a one legged ice skating shrew shouldn't be talking about the concept of libraries and the art of reading. How's that pre-nup working out Paul?

written by Morse, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Resigns After Being Fired

Helen Thomas, the 89-year-old White House reporter, is retiring after being fired for making controversial statements about Israel and the Jews.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Helen Thomas Off to France for Vacation!

Sarkozy amends law, demands she wear burgua for 'elf & safety of citizens!

written by Morse, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Fastest Pit Stop By Sitting President in Race to Obscurity!

Obama: from ass licker to ass kicker in just 46 days!

written by Morse, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Elton Sings At Limbaugh's Wedding!

#Elton John Sings at Limbaugh's 4th Wedding! Could he turn out to be wife #5?

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Obamama (oops) cancels Aussie trip because the "mugs" spelt his name wrongly on their "mugs"!

President Obamama? was furious when he heard that the Aussies coudln't even spell his name, he retorted "we allow Mel Gibson to live here so what's the problem dammit and stuff your koala's too!"

written by Jaggedone, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Boomer Applies For Medicare.

First Boomer to apply for medicare asked if he would rather have some prime weed. "We're a little short of cash at the present."

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Wall Street A Mess

Stocks take a plunge after inside TV shows workers at the NYSE running around naked, pulling their hair out by the roots. Pulling their roots out by the hair!

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Obama Finally Masters The 'Mean' Look!

Obama says he's finding out 'whose ass to prick' over Gulf disaster

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Obama Blasts BP Contributors To His Campaign!

Obama says he's finding out 'whose ass to lick' over Gulf disaster. Sorry, that should be "kick".

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

The Seventh Stooge!

Most not really surprised when they find out that the Head of BP Oil is nicknamed "Slick".

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Peace Put On Hold

North Korea's Kim calls off peace talks with US, South Korea until Scooby Doo marathon is over.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Truth Finally Comes Out

Radar O'Reilly admits that Father Mulcahy touched him in a bad place.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Netanyahu Cheated!

President Obama abandons Beer Conferences after last one turned into a pissing contest.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Al Gore May Change Name To G.W.

Al Bore blames global warming for BP oil leak, marriage falling apart, boil on his ass!

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

10% Losing Identity

At least one in ten have been the victims of identity according to an unidentified source.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Another Bad Sign

US Gross National Product is showing some really gross numbers!

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Biggie Wins Again

Big Company wins lawsuit as prosecutor demonstrates that whistle-blower can't whistle.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

The Gores Talk

Al and Tipper Gore agree that all their problems started with Al's preoccupation with Discos.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Suicide Bombers Need Help

Experts: Continuing suicide bombers in Iraq and Afghanistan a cry for help!

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

"I Feel Your Pain!"

Crying BP Oil Executive caught with onion in handkerchief while viewing blackened beaches, birds.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

BP The Blame

An upset US congress blaimes BP Oil for recent information leaks!

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

It's About Time!

Helen Thomas retires to spend more time with old Nazi friends in Brazil.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Police Going Green

Police in Washington and Oregon are told to use only rechargeable battery tasers, recycled billy clubs, natural Chinese handcuffs!

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Recall Being Felt

With recall of children's liquid Tylenol, many crawling across border to get medication.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Jobless Rate Climbs

Jobless rate in U.S. expected to go beyond 20% once census ends, according to census report on those that have jobs.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Earth, Moon Formed Later

Earth and Moon formed '120 million years later than previously thought'. Though, admittedly, most have never given it a thought.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Britain Indoors

A life on the sofa: Shocking survey reveals more than half of Brits have NEVER done outdoor activities. Claim that there are Loonies about!

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Are Parents Too Stupid?

Taxpayers fund course to teach teens how to wear high heels to work. Twist their ass while walking around the boss.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

The Fall Guy

The Cabinet fall guy: Education Secretary comes a cropper in an embarrassing slip-up. Close Up Pic of busted ass on page 5.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Around & Around It Goes

Briton wanted for gangland shooting is gunned down in 'contract killing' on Costa del Sol. Police now looking for "contract killer".

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Calling Health Dept!

Australian Cafe claims world's biggest booger! I'm sorry, that's the world's biggest burger!

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

A Lot Less Traffic There

Park Service to relocate Boston visitors center in New Bedfort!

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Always The Last To Know!

Gov. hears how fishermen, tourism hurt by spill. "You see Governor, spilled oil is BAD. Pretty beaches are GOOD!"

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Probably Had A Bad Agent

75 long-lost, never-heard-before silent movies being returned to US.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

She Must Have Been Mad!"

Lawyer: Sheen to plead guilty to misdemeanor of wife placing neck into his knife.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

More Jobs Here Would Help

AP analysis: More factory jobs ease economic pain, especially if we locate them here instead of Mexico, China & India.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Seniors Being Pitched Around

Obama pitching seniors on health bill. "Just hang on. You will all be out of your misery in a short while."

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Obama Teleprompter Acts Up!

Obama talks tough on spill; "I'm here to kill ass and take gnomes! Something wrong with the teleprompter!"

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Star Attorney Appears

Star attorney to take stage at Blagojevich trial as Matlock appears in a wheelchair.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Life On Titan?

Strange Discovery on Titan Leads to Speculation of Alien Life as abandoned lawn chairs tied to helium balloons show up in new pictures.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Crocodiles Scattered #3

Secret Revealed: How Crocodiles Cross Oceans? Many were stowaways clinging to old clipper ships.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

So Lang As There is Beer & Chips!

To ESPN, knowledgeable US soccer fan not oxymoron. Lots of yells of "Hey, I think somebody just did something!"

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Fishing Boat Pulls Up Canisters

Clam boat pulls up canisters off NY, two skeletons with feet in cement, crew sickened.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Marvin Isley Dead At 56

Marvin, youngest of Isley Brothers, dies at 56! A lot of twisting & shouting expected at funeral.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

No Alien Forms On Titan?

Strange Discovery on Titan Leads to Speculation of Alien Life. However, Martians say that we're building false dreams.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Might Be Real

Strange Discovery on Titan Leads to Speculation of Alien Life, especially after the big-headed photos sent back.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Simple Explanation #2

Secret Revealed: How Crocodiles Cross Oceans? Experts say they threatened porpoises, dolphins until they piggy-backed them there, for a fresh start.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Simple Explanation

Secret Revealed: How Crocodiles Cross Oceans? Evolutionists say they flew there as birds but feathers devolved back to loose scales.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Jobs Lost #2

Steve Jobs to crowd: 'We're having a little problem here' Most people out of jobs but Jobs loses most people in bad WiFi snafu during presentation.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Rough Day For Jobs

Steve Jobs to crowd: 'We're having a little problem here' as presentation flops miserably. "Now I know how a stand-up comedian feels when his jokes flop!"

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Same Old Politics

Voters to pick Senate challengers for Reid, Boxer, Fighter, New & Old Phonies!

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Oil Spill Scatters

Fickle oil slick scatters its threats across Gulf. Doesn't seem to know where it's going or what it's after.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

'Assasinate Thatcher' Labour MP Arrested

John McDonnell has been arrested following remarks that he wanted to kill Margaret Thatcher because she 'got in his way'. The police also detained the entire GMB union conference who had applauded him

written by Ron Smith, 08 June 2010
Rating:

The Monster Mash

An evening out at the graveyard: Cemeteries seek to liven up with concerts, social events...holedowns!

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Poll On Oil Spill

POLL: BP Oil Spill Response Rated Worse than Katrina, but better than the Alamo!

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Return Of The Bush Whacker

Former President George W. Bush seen at home in interview, whacking bushes, rotating air in tires.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Presidential Slip

President Obama, when asked about fitness today, told reporters: "Michelle & I believe in keeping fit. Our family always has. Have you noticed how many Kenyans have won...We believe in staying fit!

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

WW To Clark!

Ad by Wonder Woman: Up too late last night. Clark call me. Forgot where I left my invisible plane.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

WW Looks Silly?

Ad by Clark Kent: Got a headache too. I'll fly by later. Let the plane go. You looked silly sailing through the air in a seated position.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Marvel Cancels Comic #60

Marvel Comics, having been bought out by Disney, has decided to end it's superhero comic "The Blithering Ass" series after the one issue.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Marvel Cancels Comic #59

Marvel Comics, having been bought out by Disney, has decided to end it's superhero comic "The Thingy" series after the one issue.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Marvel Cancels Comic #58

Marvel Comics, having been bought out by Disney, has decided to end it's "Dick Tracer" series after the one issue.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Marvel Cancels Comic #57

Marvel Comics, having been bought out by Disney, has decided to end it's superhero comic "Return Of The Hungry Maggot" series after the one issue.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
Rating:

Marvel Cancels Comic #56

Marvel Comics, having been bought out by Disney, has decided to end it's superhero comic "Thor Nuff" series after the one issue.

written by Bureau, 08 June 2010
« May 2010 June 2010 Jul 2010 »
Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat Sun
 
1st
90
2nd
86
3rd
112
4th
108
5th
79
6th
143
7th
106
8th
81
9th
69
10th
87
11th
89
12th
72
13th
149
14th
96
15th
118
16th
95
17th
105
18th
93
19th
71
20th
89
21st
81
22nd
93
23rd
143
24th
80
25th
162
26th
149
27th
121
28th
122
29th
154
30th
121
 

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