Order by:
Rating:

Memory man forgets book

Robert Jones's memory got so bad he went out and bought a book
called DYNAMIC MEMORY TECHNIQUES but when he got home he forgot where he put it.

written by SPECTRUM, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Obama Shifty

President Obama shifts focus to jobs. "Our new healthcare plan will help produce more jobs because many will claim disabilities to draw a check and therefore open up jobs for others."

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Pot Calls Kettle Black

Both Republicans & Democrats in the US Senate blame most of Haiti's problems on voodoo economics.

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Obama At Super Bowl?

President Obama is finally talked out of making a halftime speech at Super Bowl. Instead, will have interview with Katie Couric just before game.

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Obama: Say What?

Leader of Kuwait crowd who cheered on US troops coming into Baghdad six years ago says they have yet to be paid.

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Wheels Of Justice...

US Drone rocket takes out Saddam Hussein's apple polisher and food taster this morning.

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Hair Of The Dog

Jeff Foxworthy says that it's hard to be a stand up comedian. "I got to limber up with a few redneck jokes before I shave or I'll get the shakes so bad, I cut myself.

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Scream Last Thing Heard

NASA admits that Mars Rover may be refusing to talk because it accidentally ran over the last Martian.

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

He'd Have An Interpreter

After wrestler, clown elected, Minnesota now considering first signing gorilla for Senator.

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Al-Jazeera Plans Big Week

Al-Jazeera planning to show old home movies of the bin Laden family plus American Presidential Bloopers during sweeps week.

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Sandy Claus??

Rosie O'Donnell says Santa is a woman! "A man simply would not give a hoot if you were naughty or nice, probably prefer you naughty."

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Rand Paul For Senator

Rand Paul, son of Ron Paul, makes his bid for Kentucky Senator with new slogan, "Slide your fine ass over here and give us a vote, Honey Child'!!"

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Knifed a motherless bairn

Paris Hilton = I Slit Orphan

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Hysterectomy needed?

Paris Hilton = I Snip Harlot

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Buggery would do it

Paris Hilton = Split a rhino

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

On the 1.45pm to Warsaw

Paris Hilton = Polish train

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Braids a hippo cousin

Paris Hilton = Plaits Rhino

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

On the road to carnivore rack and ruin

Paris Hilton = Sirloin path

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Chignon's all messed up!

Paris Hilton = Lost hairpin

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Lassie?

Peraches Geldof = Fecal sheepdog

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

She's the pits!

Peaches Geldof = Deep Fecal Hogs

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Calm canine meat

Peaches Geldof = Dog Flesh Peace

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Divine intercession needed!

Peaches Geldof = God Help Faeces

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Top privet a disaster!

Peaches Geldof = Ace Hedge Flops

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Pa was a missionary position man

Peaches Geldof = He Faced Gospel

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Scrawl graffitti on KY outlet?

Peaches Geldof = Deface Gel Shop

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Shitty little bitch?

Peaches Geldof = Fecal Sheepdog

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Chelsea Team Quarantined after Sex Revelations involving Entire Squad!

Health Care officials alerted after several players show signs of 'Spotted Dick." "that's a dessert you eat, you bloody fool" said one! "Right Chap, why do you think I'm so fooking concerned!"

written by Morse, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Martina Hingis to Return to Tennis Circuit

Says "I probably can't make top player, but I can be # 1 in Fun by showing some bum"

Go Martina!

written by Richard DagNabbit, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Another Breakthrough

Surgeons at Vanderbilt Hospital in Nashville replace man's smashed penis with middle finger.

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

SEC Called in After Obama Cabal Pockets Windfall after Selling Toyata Stock Short!

Department of Transportation Secretary Ray LaHood, former ILLINOIS SENATOR
claims his slam of Toyota was inadvertant. Raymond Burris and Blago back him up. Rep. Jesse Jackson, Jr. takes 5th.

written by Morse, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Incursion into skinny porkers' home?

Valentines Day = Invade Lean Sty

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Australian banker caught acting "HUMAN" he was Googling porn!

Contrary to the human perception of bankers that they are a bunch of corrupt aliens! A banker has been caught showing signs of HUMAN BEHAVIOUR, wanking over a porn bitch on the internet caught on TV

written by Jaggedone, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Are they all able seamen/women?

Valentines Day = Ten Navy Ladies

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Japanese currency responsible for recession?

Valentines Day = Vast Yen Denial

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Overjoyed at all this seafaring buggery!

Valentines Day = Elated Navy Sin

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Rent something bigger if you want a shag in the back!

valentines Day = Leased Tiny Van

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Harry Reed Inspects First Ever Male Brothel in Nevada!

Concluding a 15 minute health inspection and a 35 minute interview with employees, Harry commented: "Felt fine to me!" Your 'Stimulus at Work.'

written by Morse, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Miniscule lorry all locked up

Valentines Day = Sealed Tiny Van

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Newest UK Outrage: 280 year old path 'too dangerous to deliver mail on!"

Royal Mail spokesman finally confesses reason no one received Christmas mail was cobblestone path was too dangerous for postie with hangover to negotiate.
Mail in sacks can be picked up at Oasis Pub!

written by Morse, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Don't give in to fiendish burkha!

Valentines Day = Deny Satan Veil

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Craves something demonic

Valentines Day = Satan Devil Yen

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

British MP Suggests Immigrants Earn their Way before Receiving Benefits!

Under Sharia Law the woman was sentenced to death by stoning. Execution squad picked from latest arrivals all receiving cash, housing, health care and benefits for children left behind in Pakistan.

written by Morse, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Sordid sailors' can

Valentines Day = Seedy Naval Tin

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Neurotic Bigfoot sold here!

Valentines Day = Vends Anal Yeti

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

9 Year Old Boy Expelled from School for 2 inch long Gun

The school principal in defense of his questioned action said "size doesn't matter, he could still be viable."

written by Richard DagNabbit, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Secret Bidder Who Bought Churchill's Cigar Wants Money Back!

DNA lab confirms cigar never touched Winston's lips, but was used as a Butt Plug during worst of London Bombings!

written by Morse, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Jealous of bum calories?

Valentines Day = Anal Diets Envy

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

She's so neurotic!

Tensed Anal Ivy

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Vanessa Perroncel Says She's Sworn off Soccer Forever!

The former Chelsea practice goalie who never stopped a shot said she's had it!
Premier League Officials send her off with a lavish party and a complete golf kit and set of clubs to help her score.

written by Morse, 04 February 2010
Rating:

All's well that ends well

Valentines Day = Yes, Valiant End

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

There'll be trouble!

Valentines Day = Yes, Vandals Nite

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Lindsay Lohan's New "Handle"

"Twit"

written by Richard DagNabbit, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Pelosi & Reid Shocked When Brown Rebells Against Hazing Ritual!

Newly elected Senator flatly refused to lower his pants to be spanked by the duo despite claims it was part of the initiation. When told they could' kiss his ass', both decided to spank each other.

written by Morse, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Everybody loves a sailor!

Valentines Day = Enlisted A Navy

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Made for sinning...

Valentines Day = A Venal Destiny

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Borrows from inexperience?

Valentines Day = Lends A Naivety

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Excuses, excuses!

Valentines Day = Invents a delay

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Razzed covetousness?

Valentines Day = Tanalised Envy

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Scott Brown Surprised at Hidden Booty Found in Kennedy Office!

Four cases of scotch, a pallet of gin, giant tins of cocktail onions and olives discovered in false wall behind bidet. Calling for coffee, Scott shocked to find topless staffer arriving on her knees!

written by Morse, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Pervy, but no nutter!

Valentine's Day = Deviantly Sane

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Two Valentine's Getaways that Won't Break the Bank

1. Park the Motorhome in a Wall Mart Parking lot overnight and head out to dinner at McDonald's.

2. Park at a Burger King and have a Whopper with 4 large Schlitz Malt Liquor Bulls and sleep it off

written by Richard DagNabbit, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Jealous at shrink?

Valentines Day - Envied Analyst

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Elin & Toni Announce Plans to Take Back Tiger & Terry!

The foursome said they will cement their marriage vows during a cruise on Woods yacht, "Cuckold", wherein they will all jump in a pile and shag each other unmercifully in an 'act of self cleansing!'

written by Morse, 04 February 2010
Rating:

MSN Asks: Are Frugal People No Fun at All?

Are Members of Congress on a 24/7 "Fun" Ride at Six Flags Magic Mountain?

written by Richard DagNabbit, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Taco Bells' Drive thru Diet Debunked

Its actually the De-Con in the mystery meat that makes you lose weight, not the soda pops.

written by Richard DagNabbit, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Portsmouth FC announce new owner.

Avram Grant celebrates by putting on his best suit and splashing out on a new Thai.

written by Bill Licks, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Denny's Offering Free "Grand Slam" Breakfast Again for February Special

+ a "To Go" package of barf and body bags.

written by Richard DagNabbit, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Coca Cola's New Strategy: "Mini Cans" at twice the Price

Less for more, from our favorite fountain friends.

written by Richard DagNabbit, 04 February 2010
Rating:

New Report: Government Underestimated Job Losses in 2009 Reports

Up to a million additional unemployed due to layoff have now been "identified."

Time for a "Congressional Layoff?"

written by Richard DagNabbit, 04 February 2010
Rating:

US Supreme Court Says "Questioning Government" is Irresponsible"

This group has bigger balls than a Giant Wabitt.

written by Richard DagNabbit, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Obama and China enter Cold War and McDonalds don't get Chinese Chickens!

McDonalds are at the centre of a brewing cold war between the US and China. Obama has told China, "Nuke North Korea or else" China replied, "FLUCK YOU" and issued a Chlinese Chlicken export!

written by Jaggedone, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Check The Telephone Book

"The Potted Puffer" is one of over 100 stores for the sales of medical marijuana California has closed this week.

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

U.S. "Missiles" and "Missile Shields" Around the World to Top 100,000 by Year's End

I think we need a re-think to this strategy. Quick.

written by Richard DagNabbit, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Giacometti Sculpture of Dead Spoofer Walking Sold for over $ 100M

The sculpture was inspired by the sad tale of a Spoofer who encountered a Huge Bunny one too many times and got "toasted."

written by Richard DagNabbit, 04 February 2010
Rating:

CNN Clears Obama Rumor

Allegations that Sen. Barack Obama was educated in a radical Muslim school known as a "madrassa" are not accurate, according to CNN. It was just outside Riyadh in Saudi Arabia.

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Weak Oil Demand Cutting Shell Oil Profits

Tony Blair proposes "one time" Profit Enhancement Tax" on UK citizens.

written by Richard DagNabbit, 04 February 2010
Rating:

IRS Reverses Position on Sex Workers Tax Deducitons

The previously allowed deductions for using prostitutes as medicinal "relaxants" is now being disallowed.

Taxpayer Revolt Expected.

written by Richard DagNabbit, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Did Michele O'Bomba Share Too Much?

Can't say for sure, but when she bends over she certainly "shares a ton!"

written by Richard DagNabbit, 04 February 2010
Rating:

No Melting Icebergs

Descendants of those who went down with the Titanic ask, "Where was global warming when we needed it?"

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

NASA Explains

NASA defends strange acting astronauts. "Yeast cells got into recycle machine. The were all pissed."

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Getting Really Close

Report: U.S. scientists close to creating artificial life, after three year study of test model, Amy Winehouse.

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Valentine's Day Reminder

With Valentine's Day close, florists say don't forget to stop and smell and hear the bioengineered flowers.

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Not A Ghost Of A Chance

Caspar Milquetoast appears before congress to represent ghosts tired of haunting houses emptied when people left, because they couldn't pay mortgages.

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

US Congress Faces "Excruciatingly Torturous Vote" on Loading Taxpayers up with Additional $ 2T in Debt

However, insiders say its "sure to pass"

written by Richard DagNabbit, 04 February 2010
Rating:

"Us Is Rich!"

"Pearl" hillbilly found in mountain oysters turns out to be hog kidney stone.

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Watching For Al-Qaida

House forgets to place "Stimulus Package" on box headed to Senate for approval. Senator have it blown up by security guards.

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Not A Word

SUE SMITH: Why does no party speak for the women of middle England who have beards?

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Something They're Calling "Swine Flu"

So much for the Swine flu epidemic: National website and helpline are shut down. Tired of hearing, "I've got a bone in my leg", "My ass has cracked" jokes, say helpline operators.

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Prince Charles Strike Back!

Prince Charles hits out at climate change sceptics as top scientist calls for critics to provide evidence for views. Prince told, "We already have, you haven't been listening, even with those ears."

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Not All 999 Calls Answered

Police 'cannot attend every 999 call' claims Chief Constable. "A person could get badly injured doing that."

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Postman Will Not Deliver

Postmen told not to deliver mail 'because cobbled street is too dangerous'. Plus there's this Hyacinth Bucket woman.


written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Sex Too Loud

Students at all-women Cambridge college sent email asking them to be quieter when having sex. Professors not getting enough sleep while hanging around windows.


written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Your Tax Money At Work

Fury as 13-year-old pupils get pregnancy tests at school, especially after including males.

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Several Lose Breakfast

Time to 'lance the festering putrid puss-filled boil on our collective ass' of resentment over 'unfairness' of immigration, says Labour's Margaret Hodge. "Can I be excused, I've made myself sick."

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Maybe New Reality/Quiz Show?

Premier League football manager Avram Grant may face police quiz in brothel inquiry! "OK, Avram, first question, for $100, what can you get a lady there to do?"

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Golf Not The Same

Mickelson ready to get back to golf! Uh, Phil is ready to play! Some golf. Against All Pros! Uh, is that him now? Caddy? Phil Mickelson's caddy ready to get back to golf! (I sure miss Tiger).

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

A Den Of Iniquity, Roosting Chickens

Obama responds to ire over 2nd anti-Vegas remark. "I guess my preacher, Jeremy Wright, pounded that 'Sin City' into my head pretty good."

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Taylor Swift Defended

The head of Taylor Swift's record label is fired up and ready to defend his superstar from people who are criticizing her Grammy-night performance. "You're all full of shit!"

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

40% Preventable

Report: 40 percent of traffic accidents are preventable. "If you'd simple stay at home."

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

China To Blame

Tainted milk shows China's food safety challenges as US, Britain blame Chinese imports with lead causing us to sit on our fat asses more.

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Cucumbers Know What You're Doing

Study: Vegetative brains show signs of awareness. Know when they are being sliced up for salads.

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

More Worms Into Space

Iran announced it has launched a menagerie of animals, including a mouse, two turtles and worms, into space on a research rocket. President Ahmadinejad: Lost contact. May have gone into wormhole.

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Worms In Space

Iran says it launched a mouse, two turtles and worms - into space on a research rocket, a feat President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad said showed Iran could defeat the West in the battle of technology.

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Commerce To Double?

Commerce secy to detail push to double exports as present number one export are military troops.

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Jackson Doctor Arraigned?

Source: Michael Jackson's doctor to be arraigned Friday. Also Bubbles the Chimp subpoenaed to testify about doctor's influence on Jackson.

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Lawmakers To Pay Back Expenses

UK auditor: 392 lawmakers must pay back expenses, such as "hooker, so I wouldn't be so tense at meetings."

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

New Light Cast On Death Cat

Doctor casts new light on cat that can predict death! "Look, there he is over there in that dark corner where I shine my new telephone/flashlight."

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

A Harsh Judge

US Baptists to appear before Haitian prosecutor, Papa Doc Mather.

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

"Piss On Trump"

Donald Trump is at odds with officials in Rancho Palos Verdes over weddings at an oceanfront park next to his Trump National Golf Club. May put in pay toilets.

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Could Be Right

Court says '80s hit 'Down Under' copies kids' song, "Down Under, Mate".

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Heinz Changes Kerchup

Heinz revamps ketchup packets. From now on, ketchup will be on the outside, much easier to use than tearing open package.

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

US Cleric Taught Underwear Bomber

US cleric: Accused plane bomber was my student but I never told him to put explosives in his underwear. That is stupid, as 72 virgins would be useless to him & he to them,

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Speaker Charged With Deaths

Self-help speaker charged in sweat lodge deaths. Claims he couldn't help himself.

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Sure They Will

NYC conviction doesn't silence Pakistani scientist. Of course, Gitmo detainees expected to go peaceably.

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Bad Construction Plans Blamed

Vehicle to be checked in deadly Nevada casino crash. Casino admits that it should have built off to side of the road.

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Cat Predictions Always True

Doctor casts new light on cat that can predict death. "It's a 'death cat'!"

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

'We' Are Not Abused

Couples Who Say 'We' Fare Better in Fights. Queen Elizabeth was right all this time.

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Brown Takes Kennedy Chair

Brown taking over the late Sen. Kennedy's seat immediately after bourbon, old man smell removed.

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Might Come In Handy

House faces tough vote on $1.9 trillion more debt. "Couldn't we add another 1,000 million to round it off, for pocket change?"

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Prius Problems

Toyota says Prius had brake design problems as Japanese continue to drag their feet over braking problems.

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Three Camels Sold for Millions of Dollars in United Arab Emirates

Three camels were sold today at a market in the United Arab Emirates for millions of dollars. Meanwhile a man in Manchester sold three camels (out of a packet of 20) for 88p.

written by IN SEINE, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Exoplanet gas Spotted on Planet Far from Earth

Not too Far to send US elected representatives to investigate. Send them all - we'll wait for their return.

written by Richard DagNabbit, 04 February 2010
Rating:

UK Castle Ordered Detroyed by Bureaucrats

Allegedly because local building authorities didn't know about it even though built to exceed all codes.

Can you spell O-R-W-E-L-L-I-A-N L-O-G-I-C

written by Richard DagNabbit, 04 February 2010
Rating:

First Lady: I'm Not that Interesting

Neither is your husband anymore.

Find the back door ok?

written by Richard DagNabbit, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Is it Time to Cash in Your Savings Bonds?

Time to cash in your cash is more like it.

written by Richard DagNabbit, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Clinton to Americans Held in Iran: Fughettaboutit You Deadbeats!

Once out, do ya' think a little chat with Ms. Hillary might be in order?

written by Richard DagNabbit, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Unruly Passenger Says Behavior was Result of Pot Cookies

The pot laced cookies, are supposed to be for medicinal purposes only. Nonetheless, Keebler eying commercial production for the masses.

written by Richard DagNabbit, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Senate Report: "Dirty Money Still Entering U.S."

While all the clean money has already departed.

written by Richard DagNabbit, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Pay Czar Says Insurance and Banker Boy Bonuses are "Outrageous" But Legal

Hey Mr. Pay Czar: What Good are ya'?

written by Richard DagNabbit, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Air Pollution

EPA scientists discovered why the air always smelled so bad in their Washington offices. You thought I was going to say that they had their heads up their arses? You're right!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 04 February 2010
Rating:

EPA to Increase Jobless Rate

EPA wants to reduce SMOG levels in cities by taxing polluting automobiles. Poor people need their old cars to go to work, assuming they have a job in this recession, & can't afford to buy a Prius.

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 04 February 2010
Rating:

I'm Running Again, Maybe

Harold Stassen ran for President of the USA 12 times as a GOP candidate. Ralph Nader has run for the job 5 times. The big question is what party & obstructionist platform will Ralph choose next time?

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 04 February 2010
Rating:

New Revelation in Space

Pretender president Mahmoud Ahmadinejad is very disappointed by Iran's latest gambit in space. Pictures taken from the rocket show that the Earth revolves around the Sunni!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Quick Fix

Joe Smith got a letter of instructions from his Toyota dealer about his Prius. It advised him that in case of brake failure, he was to open the driver's door & drag his left foot on the road surface.

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Water Pollution

Environmentalists are concerned that state funding cuts for environmental programs may degrade on-going in-place clean air/water availability, as well as eliminating the food in their "rice bowls!"

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Excuses, Excuses

Dear Professor my research paper on global warming/climate change will be a little late, as I am snowed-in at my apartment in Honolulu HI.

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 04 February 2010
Rating:

President Wears Suspenders

The president promised government was going to tighten its belt during the latter part of this recession. Then, why does the proposed 2011 federal budget have a $1.6 trillion deficit?

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Why Do We Keep Electing These People

Senator Kerry wants a Constitutional amendment to negate the recent Supreme Court decision on Campaign spending by corporations. It requires a 2/3 Senate vote (67). There are 40 Republican Senators.

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Making Moonshine

Rare Charles Darwin book found on toilet bookshelf finally finished by experts saying it is authentic and that the missing link at that time was in today's Maggoty, Arkansas.

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Burns Up Calories

More Americans plan to travel during this year's Super Bowl than ever...from couch to kitchen to couch to kitchen.

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Parents Picketing

New Disney ride "Father Mackenzie's Alter Boy Chase" not drawing much of a crowd.

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

I Got Sick

New Disney ride "Grandpa Wussy's Mildly Worrying Ride of Dips" not drawing much of a crowd.

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

And 35 Years Old!

Old man on street in front of San Diego hotel insults Trek Con nerd with "Does your wife or girlfriend share your hobby? You haven't got one have you? I do."

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Star Struck

Old man on street in front of San Diego hotel insults Trek Con with "In a parallel universe, women like old weiners."

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Could Be

Old man on street in front of San Diego hotel insults Trek Con with "I've seen butt hair more realistic than that Kirk's toupee."

written by Bureau, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Friend of Slain Lottery Winner Arrested; Suspicion of Murder

Money brings out the Best in Friends.

written by Richard DagNabbit, 04 February 2010
Rating:

White House Calls Iranian Space Launch a "Provacative Act"

But maintains none of the 8,800+ launches by the US are in no way provocative.

written by Richard DagNabbit, 04 February 2010
Rating:

CIA director's son's dirt?

The Flintstones = Tenet son's filth

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Use a hanky forgawdssake!

The Flintstones = Teen's Filth Snot

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Adult dirt only

The Flintstones = Not Teens' Filths

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Nervous attic clues?

The Flintstones = Tense Loft Hints

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Christian Science Monitor: Don't Let Illegal Immigrants Take US Jobs

Uh..a little late for that one don't ya' think?

written by Richard DagNabbit, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Don't know about the tenth one, though...

The Flintstones = Feels Ninth Tots

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
Rating:

Damned cheeky stealing!

The Flintstones = Insolent Thefts

written by queen mudder, 04 February 2010
« Jan 2010 February 2010 Mar 2010 »
Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat Sun
1st
86
2nd
147
3rd
172
4th
155
5th
154
6th
142
7th
123
8th
109
9th
183
10th
146
11th
0
12th
163
13th
115
14th
136
15th
133
16th
93
17th
180
18th
185
19th
183
20th
211
21st
121
22nd
99
23rd
134
24th
166
25th
99
26th
113
27th
109
28th
150

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 4 plus 2?

9 3 6 22


Go to top