Order by:
Rating:

No Corn Hole!

Golf, rugby accepted as Olympic sports. Dwarf bowling still being considered! But corn hole declared illegal.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Point/Counterpoint

Police scheme to put bright yellow labels and small flashing red light on valuables left in cars is branded an 'advert to thieves'. "But we hide in the trunk."

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Winehouse Interpretation

Amy Winehouse says that she has completed her living will adn now, unless she wills it, she can't die.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Experts Advise Getting It Off Chest Important

The National Health Service says that if you don't get any sleep at night, that it is good for you to tell every single person you meet all about it.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Census Figures

Census Bureau reveals that there are exactly 9,942 people still working on the 2010 census.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Rep. Anthony Weiner petitions to change name....

...but "Johnson" isn't expected to be much better.

written by Jill The Shill, 04 August 2010
Rating:

A Bad Experience

Lindsay Lohan tells reporters that she hopes to drink enough to get that jail thing out of her mind for good.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Now Fighting Over Tree

Flare-up over tree accents Israel-Lebanon tension. "That was our tree/That was our tree!"

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Legal Marijuana Tax

San Jose becomes latest California city to vote on marijuana tax. Mayors of other US cities: Why didn't you tell us we could tax the stuff?

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Prop 8 Struck Down

SOURCE: JUDGE KNOCKS DOWN GAY MARRIAGE PROP IN CA! So what was all the voting about?

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Michelle's Eating Habits

Michelle Obama's eating habits: No to beets, yes to cleanses. Since reading about cleanses, I thought I would share.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Ground Zero Mosque

Conservative group sues to stop mosque near ground zero. "The Ground Zero Mosque doesn't sound very safe anyway."

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

BP Leak Plugged

Much work remains even with BP leak plugged. "I was afraid they were about to plug us", says new CEO.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Horny Roo hunts Aussie women "Down Under"?

An oversize very horny grey Roo (nicknamed Wayne) has been bouncing after women "Down Under". His "piece" is rather large and the women, although curious, would prefer it be a "black one"!

written by Jaggedone, 04 August 2010
Rating:

East European/Asian Demography Demand!

Population shifts and natural disasters in under populated countries have lead to an SOS for "people". Relocation incentives include free healthcare, UK type "social" benefits and legalised brothels.

written by iscrivener, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Should Have RefusedThird Helping

Aretha Cracks Ribs, Will Miss Brooklyn Debut as piece of BBQ hits her in the eye.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Let's Drill Again!

The Obama Administration is tinkering with pulling the plug on its temporarily moratorium on deepwater drilling in light of the BP oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico & upcoming elections.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Housing alarm

The shortage of housing could be ended through plans to move old people from their Council Houses to Sheltered Housing. However the move from Sheltered Housing to the next stage could be a problem.

written by j.w., 04 August 2010
Rating:

Afghan Training Hits Stumbling Blocks

UN encounters stumbling blocks in training Afghans. "Some of those blocks are rigged to explode but they'll fall over one every time.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Another Treasure Story

English treasure hunter hasn't found a fortune in Roman coins but did find that lost sock stuck inside his underwear.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

You Betcha!

Iran says explosion near president just fireworks. Someone gave guy a hotfoot just as he threw his shoe.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Look-Alike A Great Man, Says Saddam

Departing US troops pack millions of items in Iraq. The real Saddam comes out of hiding place.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Troops Leaving Iraq

Departing US troops pack millions of items in Iraq, a few earning the nickname "Gold Bricks".

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

The Very First Political Lie Was Sure A Doozy

Historians say that the very first political lie was "Ah no, Tyrone, we don't call it The White House because only White people are allowed inside."

written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 August 2010
Rating:

The Amazingly, Amazing, Talking Japanese Female Dolls Are So Gosh Darn Life-Like!

A scientist in Japan has developed the most life-like female doll yet. It walks up to you and says, "Ah most kind sir, so sorry to say you reave toiret seat up. Prease go put down now."

written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Where Oh Where Is The Wisconsin Tundra Going?

The state of Wisconsin says that due to its horrible financial state it will be selling off 2 by 2 inch commemorative pieces of its infamous tundra for $97.98 plus tax.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 August 2010
Rating:

The End of The Russian Spies For American Spies Trading Business

Russia says they don't have any more American spies to trade for Russian spies. They ask President Obama if he will accept Vodka instead, "Why hell yeah, ship dat shit on over here ya hear?"

written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 August 2010
Rating:

The Los Angeles School District Knows What It Wants

The Los Angeles School District has voted that the word Hmmmm is not really a word and will not be used in the classroom or the playground.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Lady Gaga Screams Out About The Bulge In Her Crotch

Lady Gaga says she's sick and tired of being asked about the noticeable bulge in her crotch. She screamed out at a female reporter for Fox, "Yes, bitch, it's a pee pee! it's a pee pee! it's a pee pee!

written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 August 2010
Rating:

The Louisiana Souvenir Tar Balls Are Here!

The story that vending machines in Louisiana are dispensing Tar Ball Souvenirs has proven to be false. The Souvenir Tar Balls can actually be purchased over-the-counter at most drug stores.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Cereal Dropped

Kellpost Cereal Company say that pressure has been brought upon them so much that they are dropping their latest cereal, "Turnin' Twix"!

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Nashville Operation

Hospital patient in Nashville claims he woke up during surgery and overheard, "Hey look! You touch this little part of the brain and he gets an instant erection. I think we may become rich!"

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Bank Robbers Get Away Easily

Bank robbers use big artificial dongs hanging out pants after seeing all lady tellers. "Describe them Mam?" "Well they had huge dongs. Also, their dongs musta been 15 inches. Did I mention the dongs?"

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Hide Escape Vehicle In 1,000 Others

Bank robbers in England escape in a souped-up wheelie bin!

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Winning Over Women Voters

Former Alaskan governor Sarah Palin says that she has not decided if she will throw her vibrator into the ring for the 1012 presidential race.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Will Pick It Back Up When Released

At last! Burglar who broke into almost 700 homes is FINALLY locked up after judge's patience runs out. Apparently he was going for a new world record.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Woman Cleared Of Assault Charges

Woman who rammed stiletto through boyfriend's eye and into his brain cleared of all charges, although many think this was a step in the wrong direction.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

House Prices Rise

Prices on houses for sale have risen a bit. Though few are ever sold.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Check This Hangnail!

The 100,000 under-24s living on state benefits because they claim they're too ill to work, may have to work anyway.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Ahmadinejad Nearly Killed By "Fireworks"

Iranian president Mahmoud Ahmadinejad survives grenade attack on his convoy that he says were only fireworks.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Michelle Obama, "The First Mama," Talks About Her Presidential Tramp Stamp Tattoo Rumors

Michelle Obama has denied reports that she has a tramp stamp that reads, "My Barry He Be Da Man Uh Huh!"

written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Louisiana No Longer Has Any Off-Shore Buoys

The state of Louisiana has voted to change the names of buoys to floaties in the interest of making it so much easier to pronounce.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Yes, Monica Lewinsky Did In Fact Attend Chelsea Clinton's Wedding

Reports are that Monica Lewinsky attended Chelsea Clinton's wedding. Monica was apparently disguised as a black usherette. No one recognized her because she was not wearing a blue dress.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Couric Wonders Why No One Watches Her News

SATELLITE SIN: COURIC CAUGHT MOCKING PALIN IN RAW FOOTAGE. Palin fires 'both barrels' in return.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

The Cows Formerly Known As Sacred Cows

India declares that cows are no longer sacred and can now be eaten. Millions of Indian cows seen stampeding towards the Pakistani border.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 August 2010
Rating:

The Man Who Invented The Sports Phrase USA! USA! USA! Has Been Arrested

Charlie Crackdiddy, who is credited with inventing the sports phrase, USA! USA! USA! has been arrested in South Carolina, for yelling out at Senator John Edwards, SOB! SOB! SOB!

written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 August 2010
Rating:

States Over-ruling Washington

Taxpayers shell out $700,000 for Obama's ad campaign to improve opinion of healthcare plan, that has state opponents lined up over lawsuits against the plan.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

The Stalking Capital of America Is Giving Up That Title

California is the nation's first state to outlaw the practice of binge stalking.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 August 2010
Rating:

The Geographically Challenged Sarah Palin Refuses To Answer Geographic Questions

Former Alaskan Governor Sarah Palin was asked by a reporter for National Geographic if Alaska is a state. The puzzled Palin stated that she will no longer answer any trick questions.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Mo Says No!

Missouri voters on Tuesday overwhelmingly rejected a federal mandate to purchase health insurance, rebuking President Barack Obama's administration. "He Hasn't shown us anything", says Show-Me state.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Most Oil Gone

Mud plugs well; feds say much of Gulf oil is gone after David Copperfield visit.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Defacing Currency

Little Rock, Arkansas man arrested for writing in the word "Bogus" on all the bills he spent.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Tokyo Loses Track

Mystery as Tokyo loses track of its centenarians. May subject people's claims by asking what happened in 1905-1020.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Rural Areas Down!

Big churches in major cities showing a major prophet!

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Need Two Chairs At Restaurants.

Are Americans now more honest about their weight? "They have to be", states report. "Even with the trick mirrors."

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Sun Storms Underway

Sun storms may bring northern lights farther south, mix up GPS systems. Be sure to check if that next turn isn't into the ocean!

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Locked In There Must Be Rough

United States says it's committed to cutting big house gases!

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Smoker's Brains Can Stop Habit

Doctors say that Smoker's Brains can control smoking. But most didn't have enough since to start smoking, they admit.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Christmas In July Failed

Retail Data: Americans remain cautious in Christmas In July Sales! "Over 100 degree heat doesn't help the mood", says one shopper.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Leak Leaing To Bailouts

For Gulf businesses, fading summer is a lost cause. Boating industry expecting bailouts.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Alaskan Fishing Thrives

Alaska fishing tradition thrives: dipnetting easy as fish thankful they're not in the Gulf area.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Ground Zero Mosque

Feisal Abdul Rauf, the Imam Behind the 'Ground Zero Mosque' takes out huge insurance policy.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Winner Take All

The US Economy Slows, Illegals Everywhere, Jobs Scarce, Consumers Pessimistic, Weather Stinks, Country Totally In Debt. New War In Pakistan, Everyone Has Nukes. Vegas Taking Bids On Which Will Get US.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Mud Plugs Well

Mud plugs well; feds say much of Gulf oil is gone. Politicians concerned that there won't be enough mud left over for fall elections.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Some Kind Of Action Recommended

State recommending action. "All we could come up with after three days of partying", states guy with cold cloth on his head, bucket at his feet.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Drug Boss Thought Rangers Were Police

Ryan, Cuban, head of Mexican Drug Cartel Boss face bidding war for Texas Rangers.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Judge Ready To Rule

Judge's ruling ready in Calif. gay marriage case. Admits that he loves the build-up and the limelight.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Voters Very Upset!

Another incumbent down as Michigan Rep. loses as voters want whole new government, White House moved to Tuscon!

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

GOP Point Out Tax Increases

Democrats seek GOP help for creating their 50th last-ditch jobs bill.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Lick Before They Remember

Veterinarians say that pets sometimes suffer from "Phantom Balls" Syndrome.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

The Dogs Of War

K-9 PTSD? Some vets say dogs stressed by war, too. 'Brono has shell shock, see he shakes when I go "BOOM!", says trainer. "Bit my leg!"

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Not The Best

Those who think that "the best part of waking up is Folgers in their cup" have never spilled hot Folgers into their lap!

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Just Like Old Commercials

Spectacular Northern Lights Show Signals Sun Is Waking Up, Ready For It's Raisin Bran! ("That's me!")

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Indy Does It Again

Indiana Jones says he has discovered the original Obama Kenyan birth certificate.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Spectacular Northern Lights

Spectacular Northern Lights Show Signals Sun Is Waking Up. So does 110 degree temperatures.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

It Won't Be Pleasant Here

Feisal Abdul Rauf, the Imam Behind the 'Ground Zero Mosque' admits they are seeing ghosts.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Cough It Up!

Republicans want review of birthright citizenship, especially that of Obama.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Toyota Posts Earnings

Toyota posts $2.2 billion profit as car sales recover Will use income to recall more models.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Oil Leak Sealed

Mud plugs well; feds say much of Gulf oil is gone, but so are the tourists. Asks BP for total missed revenue.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Blames Israel

Iran's Ahmadinejad survives blast near motorcade. Blames Israel, which doesn't exist.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Ahmadinejad Survives Blast

Iran's Ahmadinejad survives blast near motorcade. Except for a bowel clean-up, officials say he's fine.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Most Oil Disappeared

White House: 75 percent of spilled Gulf oil gone. Other 25% holed up near a barrier reef and threatening to take it with it, if attacked.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Cure Worse Than The Disease

White House: 75 percent of spilled Gulf oil gone. 100% of oil cleanup detergent still out there.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Close Call

Iran's Ahmadinejad survives blast near motorcade that laid both his ears back against his head.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

How life started

Scientists have just discoverd how life began on earth. A form of bacteria appeared in volcanoes in the deepest oceans at phenomenal heat. They have kept us scratching our head ever since.

written by j.w., 04 August 2010
Rating:

Global warning

It's not global warming or climate change which should worry us, but global change. We are not ready for a swap with Mars. I want to keep my Kit Kat.

written by j.w., 04 August 2010
Rating:

Dumb Pseudo-Scientist Expelled

San Francisco CA school teacher lost his job by misleading physics students. The teacher said Einstein's theory of general relativity only applied to putting cream cheese on an "everything bagel!"


written by Philbert of Macadamia, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Pelosi Loses Face

House Speaker Pelosi predicts Democrats will retain control of the US House. A constituent then hits her in the face with a Boston cream pie containing anti-Botox compounds in the whipped cream!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 04 August 2010
Rating:

TV Cameras Coming to the Supreme Court?

Six male judges & three female judges are sitting on the Supreme Court. King Obama I promised to name six female judge replacements to the court, which will then be called "The Washington DC View!"

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 04 August 2010
Rating:

It's Called Economic Insanity

President Obama taxes health care for small business, wants to add new energy taxes and let the Bush tax cuts expire. Then the president promises tax credits for small business to hire more employees!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 04 August 2010
Rating:

EPA Tackles Body Odor

EPA says that American citizens smell bad & is issuing a new regulation that underwear must be changed once per day. An exception is environmentalists, where a change three times per day is required!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 04 August 2010
Rating:

EPA Hiring Underwear Sniffers

As part of the Obama jobs program the EPA plans to hire 15,000 underwear sniffers until body odor sniffing machines, like the TSA uses at airports for security checks, can be developed.

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Garbage Out

Liberal Representative Ed Markey (D) MA & Mel Gibson suffer from the same malady. Both actors "put their mouths in motion before their brains are engaged & have no clue what they're talking about!"

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 04 August 2010
Rating:

President Obama's Birthday Party

Michelle Obama invited me to President Obama's 49th birthday party at the White House. However, I would have had to sign an agreement to work in Michelle's vegetable garden until January 20, 2013!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Negotiating School Opens in Washington DC

A political negotiating school is to employ former Obama administration Democratic far left liberal ideological snobs to teach hand to hand combat to the new Republican members of the 2011 Congress.

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Mugging San Francisco CA Style

Man found in parking garage with a banana stuck up his ass. Police indicate it was self-inflicted as perpetrator/victim was not capable of playing with a full dick!

written by Philbert of Macadamia, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Virgina Backs Arizona

Virginia Attorney General Rules Police Can Check Immigration Status! Calls Washington Ball-Less!

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

French Being French

French immigrant raid provokes protest. French failing to make other immigrant raid brings protest!

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Maybe By 2050

Federal Judge To Rule On Whether Gays, Lesbians Have Constitutional Right To Marry. This will be the 100th attempt to do and redo rulings.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Woman Sprayed

Woman Sprayed With Human Semen at Grocery Store! Man apologizes. "It was those shorts you're wearing!"

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Hottest Ever

July was Las Vegas' HOTTEST month EVER! "These girls put the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders to shame!", says Casino owner.

written by Bureau, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Canadian Outdoor Writer Mounts Record Walleye!

The former highly respected writer lost both his job and his wife after pictures were posted on Utube of a wild weekend in Newfoundland with a pair
of cross eyed strippers from St. Johns.

written by Morse, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Barney Frank goes Wild After being Refused $1 Senior Discount!

Small Business Owner of Fire Island Glory Hole says, " I don't care who he says he is, or how old he is, he pays the same as the rest of the C*****S*******kers!
Read my lips...Pay- Go or No Dick!

written by Morse, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Image of TheSpoof Writer Cal-el's face Seen in Slick

Image of TheSpoof.com writer Cal-el's face was seen in the BP oil slick, verifying that TheSpoof.com is still the only comedy and satire publication with a true son of God on its staff.

written by Cal Jennings, 04 August 2010
Rating:

Mexican Cartels Come Out with New Action Toy!

Bobble Head Dolls with No Heads now latest rage in Mexican Low Riders and gaining popularity in Los Angeles with MS 13 gang members deciding to use real people for display in clubhouse windows.

written by Morse, 04 August 2010
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84
10th
105
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92
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