Order by:
Rating:

G.M.'s Electric "Spoof" Ready To Roll

The new totally electric three-wheeled General Motors Spoof is almost ready for those who don't mind spending $30,000 and looking like complete idiots.

written by Bureau, 09 March 2009
Rating:

Medvedev Out Of Putin's Pootin

The CIA reports that Russia's Medvedev is beginning to come out from under Putin's shadow and gotten up off his lap.

written by Bureau, 09 March 2009
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Check Your Drug Reactions

Pharmacists and physicians alike ask clients to check their drugs listed reactions when combined with those in the drinking water.

written by Bureau, 09 March 2009
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Bailouts Working Out Great

The recent congressional bailouts are working out great according to those given billions, caviar and truffle suppliers, Swiss Banks.

written by Bureau, 09 March 2009
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Unknown Terrorist Group Disbanding

The Cuthroats of Cameroon's CooCoo Crazies, a previously unknown terrorist group, announced today that they are disbanding.

written by Bureau, 09 March 2009
Rating:

Punch Line One Month Too Soon.

Dallas-"I just coudn't wait until April 1st before Cutting Terrell Owens." says Cowboys Owner Jerry Jones. Tony Romo(QB) and Jason Witten(TE) complained, "He ruined the whole thing!"

written by Morbe, 09 March 2009
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Viagra's "The Patch"

Viagra introduces "The Ball Patch" that's easily applied, works great for 48 hours but a bugger to peel off your testicles.

written by Bureau, 09 March 2009
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More Bank Bailouts

After the latest bank bailouts, bankers spotted by broke clients laughing all the way to their Hummers.

written by Bureau, 09 March 2009
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One For The Money, Two For The Show

Two Wall Street executives fell to their deaths this morning as they argued over best best spot on the window ledge.

written by Bureau, 09 March 2009
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New Earth Found By Telescope

The new recently launched space telescope has already found an earth-like planet, only this planet is just a little ahead of ours and inhabited only by a gadzillion cockroaches.

written by Bureau, 09 March 2009
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Mime In Court

Mime in Paris comes to courtroom for punching out woman who walked through his invisible cube during his sidewalk performance last week, brings along his "Mouthpiece".

written by Bureau, 09 March 2009
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Gore On His Hobby Horse

Al Gore: Daylight Savings Time should be abolished because it causes more daylight hours to warm everything up, thereby helping create more global warming.

written by Bureau, 09 March 2009
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Obama Reaching A Bit

President Obama says that there is nothing for us to lose by reaching out a hand to the Taliban, Iran, North Korea, even Republicans.

written by Bureau, 09 March 2009
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Possible New Toilet Tax Protested

Newly proposed toilet flushing tax in water short California is being protested by beer drinkers, those that suffer with prostate problems and everybody else pissed over still another tax.

written by Bureau, 09 March 2009
Rating:

Leads To Gray Hair

Researchers find that two-term, eight year presidents usually leads to a lot of gray hair. Ours, not theirs.

written by Bureau, 09 March 2009
Rating:

Murdoch Apologizes For Obama Monkey

Rupert Murdoch has apologized to President Obama for the offensive cartoon in the New York Post showing Obama as a monkey. He promises newspaper cartoons will return to old "elephant ears" Obama.

written by Bureau, 09 March 2009
Rating:

Virtual Reality Headsets

Report in Science Today on the new Virtual Reality Headset that mimics all five senses will not affect Trekkies in the least, as they can do that now.

written by Bureau, 09 March 2009
Rating:

Huge Prison Population

Study finds that one in thirty one American adults are now in prison, one in three that don't bother to pay their income taxes.

written by Bureau, 09 March 2009
Rating:

Obama Reverses Bush

Barack Obama has already reversed the Bush doctrines of opening wrong doors, waging wrong wars and choosing face-shooting Vice Presidents.

written by Bureau, 09 March 2009
Rating:

Being Filthy Rich Makes You So Gosh Darn Brilliant

Warren Buffett, the world's richest man has stated that unemployment will climb a lot higher. Meanwhile, Bill Gates, the world's third richest man says that the Pacific Ocean is wet.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 09 March 2009
Rating:

The Return of Cloris Leachman?

Cloris Leachman, 82, showed up for the premier of ABC's "Dancing With The Stars." Judge Bruno Tonioli had to inform her in a sensitive way that she had been eliminated last year.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 09 March 2009
Rating:

The Zimbabwe Name Change

Due to a matter dealing with International copyright infrigement the African country of Zimbabwe will be changing its name to Zimbabus.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 09 March 2009
Rating:

Is it Ms. Madonna or Mr. Madonna?

Fans of Madonna are amazed at "The Material Girl's" bulging manly-looking biceps. A close friend reports that they would be shocked to learn of another Madonna bulge that will go unnamed.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 09 March 2009
Rating:

A Chicken By Any Other Name...

In an effort to get away from the unappealing name fried, Kentucky Fried Chicken is dropping the word Fried and replacing it with Baked. The new name will now be Kentucky Baked Chicken or KBC.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 09 March 2009
Rating:

For Sale: Air Force One - Good Condition, AC/Heat, Brand New Tires

In an effort to show the American people that the White House is concerned with the economic situation the president's plane Air Force One will be sold and replaced with National Guard One.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 09 March 2009
Rating:

The Drug Business: What Economic Crisis?

Drugmakers Merck and Schering-Plough to merge in $41 billion deal. Meanwhile Drug Cartels El Drugo and Toro-Vaca to merge in $410 billion deal.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 09 March 2009
Rating:

Rush "Mr Potato Head" Limbaugh

Hairdo Magazine has named Rush Limbaugh as 'The Man With The Biggest Head in America.' It added that in order for his body to be equally proportionate to his head, he would have to weigh 700 pounds.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 09 March 2009
Rating:

"OctuMom" Loses Her Publicist

The publicist for "OctuMom" has quit. Victor Munoz told reporters that Nadya Suleman is nuts. He added, "She wanted me to talk to ABC and have her replace Nancy O'Dell on "Dancing With The Stars."

written by Abel Rodriguez, 09 March 2009
Rating:

The Stewart Family: Martha and Jon

Jon Stewart, host of "The Daily Show," a satirical news program has announced for the first time that he is the biological son of syndicated talk show host Martha Stewart.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 09 March 2009
Rating:

Look Out Below!

A ninety-year-old man in Phoenix, Arizona celebrated his birthday by jumping out of a plane yesterday and shitting his pants just before his parachute opened.

written by Bureau, 09 March 2009
Rating:

Americans Less Religious

More and more Americans say that they have no religion. However, the fastest growing religion is now the "Five-Day Oprahs".

written by Bureau, 09 March 2009
Rating:

Outsiders Purchasing U.S. Homes

Outside buyers are being drawn to the United State's many foreclosed homes. In fact, the top 200 cities in America each now have their own "China Town" district.

written by Bureau, 09 March 2009
Rating:

Avon's New Cologne

Avon has released their new Men's Klingon Cologne "A Good Day To Die & Rot" proving a hit among geeks to help them find new friends and mates. You rub just a little on your forehead.

written by Bureau, 09 March 2009
Rating:

Mattels Britney Barbie

Parents of little girls are upset with the Mattel Toy Company and their recent release of their anatomically correct Britney Barbie with her dress and small car to exit.

written by Bureau, 09 March 2009
Rating:

Bridges Busy Day & Night

With the economy worsening by the day, bridges are booming with activity as more are sleeping under them at night and jumping off them during the day. Smart old timers are staying in unsold houses.

written by Bureau, 09 March 2009
Rating:

Blagojevich' s Hair Recovering

Former Governor Blagojevich's of Illinois is spending a few days in a Chicago hospital after the sudden late winter storm hit the city. Apparently Blagojevich was caught outdoors and his hair froze.

written by Bureau, 09 March 2009
Rating:

Hudson River Full

Rescuers of passengers of the airplane in NYC's Hudson say they were surprised that all passengers were out on the wings waiting for them until they noticed some were standing on junk in the water.

written by Bureau, 09 March 2009
Rating:

Magic Shoes

A pair of shoes worn by Sarah Palin sold for $2,000 in an online auction. Apparently, the shoes are special. You just click your heels and you're suddenly running for the Vice Presidency.

written by Bureau, 09 March 2009
Rating:

Stimulus Package Working

The word going around Washington DC is that Michelle Obama is pregnant. Democrats say that is proof positive that the President's stimulus package is working.

written by Bureau, 09 March 2009
Rating:

The Mail Has Wings

A bird scientist in Wales has developed homing ducks. He says that unlike homing pigeons who only deliver messages, homing ducks can deliver packages weighing up to three pounds.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 09 March 2009
Rating:

Charles "#78490324" Barkley

Charles Barkley has begun serving a three day jail sentence. One of the guards reportedly overheard him telling another inmate that he is planning a jailbreak.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 09 March 2009
Rating:

The Big Change At Sears

Due to lagging sales Sears is to adopt a three-step program. (1) It will lay off thousands of workers. (2) It will cut down its foreign merchandise imports. (3) It will drop both S's and become EAR.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 09 March 2009
Rating:

12,000 Happy/Not-So-Happy Troops

GOOD NEWS: 12,000 American troops will be leaving Iraq.

BAD NEWS: They're being bussed to Afghanistan.

written by Abel Rodriguez, 09 March 2009
Rating:

What Can $42 Million Get You?

Bruce Lindsay bequeathed $42 million to a small Christian university in California. The college board voted to change the school's name to That Wonderful Man Bruce Lindsay University

written by Abel Rodriguez, 09 March 2009
Rating:

Obama jealous, wants button from Hillary too

That reset button with the wrong name on it was really nice. Now, Obama feels left out. The only button he has to push kills everybody. How do you think that makes him feel. Let's give him one too.

written by Aspartame Boy, 09 March 2009
Rating:

Obama rocks!?

Psycho linguists have decoded the meaning of Obama's first name. The key sound is the "rock" sound. No rabbit, this does not mean he rocks, as many think. We are returning to the stone age.

written by Aspartame Boy, 09 March 2009
Rating:

Chineese are counterfeiting the Amero, using lead centers

Not satisfied with the 800 billion gold Ameros used to mollify them last year, the Chinese have counterfeited 20 trillion Ameros in preparation for a legal invasion in the summer of 2009.

written by Aspartame Boy, 09 March 2009
Rating:

Denver mint equipment now striking the Amero

Chinese have many Ameros produced to quell world revolt against the dollar. April will usher in new world order. Truth is out there. Way out there, man.

written by Aspartame Boy, 09 March 2009
Rating:

Aspartame Content Indicated by Secret Barcode

The elite shield themselves from the poisons meant for the commonhealth with a new bar code scanner that reveals which foods have poisons such as aspartame and which don't, since labels no longer say.

written by Aspartame Boy, 09 March 2009
Rating:

Hobos Getting High on Battery Acid and Aspartame

Not to be outdone by high school students putting videos of themselves taking diet soda / menhos enemas on U-Boob, Hobos are mixing up their aspartame recipe to get "high".

written by Aspartame Boy, 09 March 2009
Rating:

Zyclon-B approved for aerosol sprays

In a surprise move, the FDA cleared the way for the sale of Zyclon-B for use in aerosol sprays. "We figured, eh, if we can approve aspartame, we can do anything we want.", Dr. Strandgedeath said.

written by Aspartame Boy, 09 March 2009
Rating:

Aspartame Approved for Use in Pools

"We needed something toxic, but legal, to kill everything in the pool. It was a no-brainer. We saw what it did to President Reagan. So heh, we sent our lobbiest to the FDA.", Guido told us.

written by Aspartame Boy, 09 March 2009
Rating:

Ask Hitler about apartame

Featured in TheSpoof.com, an interview with someone very close to the organization about how aspartame coulda shoulda woulda been used by the Nazi's.

written by Aspartame Boy, 09 March 2009
Rating:

Premature babies drunk as skunks on aspartame

"It's a good thing they are", relayed Dr. Infernopedeo, head of the prenatal unit. "Slaves having more slaves at time when more slaves are not needed."

written by Aspartame Boy, 09 March 2009
Rating:

Obama in economic summit with Cuba

Obama was seen smoking Cuban cigars while vising with the government in Havana. It is expected that Cuba will be the first country to be issued the new Amero.

written by Aspartame Boy, 09 March 2009
Rating:

Colombia discovers Fart hideouts

Farting Farcs are being tracked and hounded by dogs of Columbia's soldiers. Cans of beans are being parachuted into Farc strongholds to encourage the passing of gas for the dogs to detect.

written by Aspartame Boy, 09 March 2009
Rating:

Intersection named after Bernanke in Dillon

Bernanke visited his hometown for an intersection naming ceremony, punctuated with a car crash.

written by Aspartame Boy, 09 March 2009
Rating:

Obama inaugurates "scientific integrity"

FDA scientists hide under their desks after flushing aspartame, fluoride, and melamine down the toilet. Too bad FDA, your record is in the public domain.

written by Aspartame Boy, 09 March 2009
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